#let's hope this gets a theatrical release

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

Okay but consider this...

Lillith did not, in fact, order Alastor to go to the hotel or protect Charlie (per say)

In fact, she might have slapped the exact opposite order on the deer, because she knew what a nightmare he could be.

It would be inifinitely more fun to have her reveal that when she drops in for a visit.

"So you sent Alastor here to protect me?"

"My dear, I told him explicitly not to fucking come here in order to protect you. But he's a wilful bastard and I should have known better." Lillith sighed, rubbing her eyes.

"So why did you come here?"

"Why, pure spite and a desire for entertainment my dear. Why not?"

"...if that's true, why didn't you ask for my soul in our deal? I... would hope my mother would trade it for your own."

"She may have, she may not have. She could just force me to release it to her too, you know that's in her power."

"That didn't answer my question..."

Lillith laughs, "Darling, I think you actually endeared yourself to the Overlord when you fought that horrid mantis woman on television. He genuinely enjoys that level of chaos... and the fact he remained against my many subtle attempts to have him leave, means perhaps the stubborn deer might actually like you."

"Preposterous, it's mere entertainment..."

"Like Rosie? Like Vox? Are they entertainment? You let her hug you and didn't even try to bite Charlie once. Oh don't get steamed, deer, I'm just yanking your tail... it's not a bad thing to care for someone. And my-... Our darling daughter..." here she winked, having scryed the initial song battle between Alastor and Lucifer, grinning widely. The two were so similar when it came to theatricality, and yet, so different in terms of everything else. "here is just the sort of creature that no one but the bleakest of fools could fail to care for."

"...how dare you imply I have any emotions, you wretched diva." The tone was mock offence and joviality, and only Lillith's echoing laughter stopped Lucifer from defending her majesty's honour.

"Oh, you do, and I'm sure you're quite fawn'd of Charlotte, you antagonistic anachronistic ancient artifact." She bounces back, airily.

"Ho, I know one should never ask a lady her age, but I don't think there's a number high enough for you to provide in answer."

"I missed these little banter sessions, Bambi, it got quite boring without someone mocking my every waking moment."

"And your husband is a poor substitute for your cruel wit, Siren, and yet... we made do with what we had. Now, how are you here? I thought Adam's little nonsense kept you pinned in place?"

"I believe Niffty took the pest out on my behalf and snapped the threads binding me there. Do get her something pretty from Rosie's and put it on my account, I know the demonic doll will adore anything from her boutique."

"Hello, can I get a word in edgewise?" Lucifer has this too-cheerful grin on his face, waving his hand like an eager student aiming for the attention of the teacher. "Hi, your husband, hello. Quick question, what the fuck are you talking about? How do you know the bellhop? How is Adam involved in any of this? And again, what the FUCK is going on here?"

"Oh... did I not say, my love?" Lillith coos, a trembling note that she knew angels used between one another to help settle ffrazzled nerves. It was always a delightful amusement to see Lucifer's ruffled feathers settle. Intriguingly, the little ex-orcist does to, and then looks confused about it. "Why, I was trapped in Heaven with my boorish first fool of a 'husband', to prevent more 'rebellion nonsense'. I had to make a rather clever deal to help Alastor get back to Hell, and I technically own his soul... but we've been friends for decades, dear. You've met twice..."

Ah, that might be why Alucard was so pissed to be dismissed, Lucifer realises. Wouldn't be the first time he'd forgotten a face.

"Charlie was abooooout ten at the time, in terms of age, my dove..." Lillith prompts. "The television sinner was there too? Do you recall that?"

"...no. But a lot of those decades were a foggy mess." Lucifer admits, trying to work out how he forgot a guy with a tv for a head. Wait, he remembered the guy with a tv for a head. "Did the television have a yellow sweater on and I kept subtly asking how the fuck he managed to get it on given the neckhole didn't seem that stretchy?"

Audience applause played from the air. "That's the one. The secret was, of course, velcro down the back. He'll say he used his powers to put it on, but he didn't have that ability back then." Alastor explains. "I do believe it was a vaguely productive meeting, even if you were only physically present, your Lowness. Why, I recall we'd taught deer Charlotte at least four new swear words by the time we left..."

Charlie, whose eyes were wide as she Recalled Something, felt her mouth fall open. "Oooooh, so you're the ones who taught me to say [very long and complicated series of words that seem to be sending Lucifer into a state of rage as yet unattainable to sinners with every syllable]... right? I said that to dad when he told me it was bathtime and I didn't want to, and he had to go set something on fire before he came back to talk about 'good words and bad words'."

Vaggie looked horrified, and snapped a glare at the radio demon.

Alastor's grin was WIDER than it should be possible to get. "Are you telling me, my dear Charlotte, was that his Majesty's tantrum was the reason that half of pentagram city was burned to the ground shortly after we left that day? Oho, that's just... delicious."

"Well I shouldn't have said it..." Charlie agonised, "I'm sorry Dad. I mean, it was a while ago,but..."

"Oh, you're not to blame Char-Char... this fucker is." Lucifer launches for Alastor, whose tendrils are manifesting... and then a startled bleat escapes as Lillith yanks him practically into her lap by the collar.

"Hold, Luci, there was no harm done in the long run. And you know I found it hilarious, in the aftermath." Lillith waves it off. She turns to the Overlord trying to right himself. "And you, you terrible influence, I do hope you haven't taught our darling anything worse while I was away?"

Charlie, caught back on the bleat sound, is watching on with stars in her eyes. She blinks. "What? No, he hasn't... well, unless you count [a strange warbling static came out of her mouth as her lips moved in what seemed like words]?"

Alastor's ears went flat in shock. "I promise you I didn't teach her that... I had no idea she could even hear that frequency, nuch less verbalise it!"

"I heard you tell Vox he should-..."

"DO NOT REPEAT THAT!" Alastor just about begged as static spilled about the room. "Do you WANT your parents to reduce me to atoms?"

Charlie blinked. "No? It was a pretty creative threat, but it wasn't that bad..."

Lucifer was pulling at a mental thread from the conversation. "Hold on, can we back up to the part where the deer was in Heaven...? How did that happen?"

Angry static filled the room until it was oppressive. Vaggie clutched at Charlie's arm whilst also putting herself between Charlie and the Overlord.

"Enough of that..." Lillith murmured and tugged at an antler. She received an indignant noise that Alastor wouldn't ever admit to with a gun to his head. "They were going to find out eventually you overdramatic cervine... might as well out with it."

The ears pinned flat. "No."

"Fine, I will... this canibalistic mass-murdering psychopath somehow got accidentally redeemed whilst fending off angels during an extermination. I strongly suspect it was because, even though they had just been fighting to the death, he still put himself in the way of those who would have killed Vox..."

Charlie was flickering between shock, anger, confusion and something that looked like it wanted to be weepy and affectionate. Hopefully she didn't settle for the latter because Lillith and Lucifer would have to pin the deer in place to avoid Alastor throwing himself out a window to avoid the whole mess.

"You... you knew it was possible... and you didn't TELL ME?!" Charlie yelled, settling on Anger.

Alastor grins, "Well, you never directly asked, did you?"

Charlie steamed, then pivoted in the old Charlie Fashion (TM) to joyful. "It's possible?!"

Lillith also adds, "From what I have heard around Heaven, it may not have been the first time... they just keep it quiet. And... well, if someone gets up there who starts doing things like, say, eating Cherubs because they were furious they were trapped there... they usually just killed them off. Unless, of course, they had the Queen of Hell there who could convince them to try another way."

"You ate CHERUBS?! They're like CHILDREN?" Lucifer is aghast.

"They are infuriatingly too-positive little nightmares with no common sense or ability to accept anyone else's viewpoint. Yes. they were delicious."

"...well, okay they're a bit of an experience but eating them?!"

"Most of them are centuries older than myself, they had enough time to learn to back off. I warned them, they persisted, I got to try angelic veal..."

Vaggie looked like she wanted to throw up. "Don't. ever. say that phrase again."

"What, angelic ve-...?"

"You stop taunting my future daughter in law or I order you to let them pet your tail." Lillith warns. It's an empty threat, she was a major proponent of bodily autonomy (anyone who'd been trapped with Adam would be) but Alastor didn't need to know that.

"You wouldn't dare!"

"I would. Now, shall I continue? Lovely. We made a deal, with Adam cosigning because I was under his contract, to allow Alastor to return to Hell as a Sinner... with a few rules that the oaf created. Particularly the one around not raising an army against Heaven, and some poorly worded nonsense about not sharing the secrets of angelic steel and implying he should not be 'fucked with' which we took to assume meant no fighting the fool. Because he certainly made passes at both of us."

Lillith's mouth turned down in distaste. Alastor looked like HE was going to be sick.

Lucifer's expression flickered demonic. "If he wasn't dead, I'd kill him again..." After everything Lillith went through in the Garden, to be trapped with a man who could never learn from his mistakes, was blind to making them. Revolting.

"Didn't want to take the Dickmaster for a spin, Bambi?" he snipes, distracting himself with the casual patter of argumentation with the overlord.

"Why, your majesty, I was busy with your wife... although comparatively, I do have good time management skills, I suppose I COULD have managed if I tried..."

"You did WHAT?!"

Lillith was trying so hard to keep a straight face as she threw a pseudo seductive expression at Alastor. "Oh darling, he's not ready to know about that..." she purrs. She sees her husband attain an almost orange colouring. "We're joking, dear... I promise."

"Dad? Try counting to te-... fifty-seven." Charlie intervenes.

"One, two-... wait, why 57?" he says, colour settling again.

"Because the number was so unusual you'd get curious about it and drop out of your funk to ask."

"...you really are so clever, Char-Char, we really made something amazing when we created you."

"Daaaaaaaaaaad, please... not in front of Vaggie." she flushes.

"Unclench, your Lowness, your wife is aesthetically pleasing but we are but friends." Alastor shrugged.

"Because you liked Vox, right?" Lucifer was awarding himself a mental medal because he REMEMBERED bits of the conversation. Wasn't that sad?

Alastor snarled. "Hardly." Oooh, that seemed like a sore spot. Time to press.

"Didn't like you back, huh? Fair. I can't fucking stand you, and-..."

"Lucifer, leave it." Lillith said. It wasn't harsh or sharp, but it conveyed that she knew something about why the Overlord's expression had fallen behind that smile, even as he forced whatever emotion that meant back into a box and reasserted the mask. "It's complicated, and now is not the time for that conversation. Suffice to say, no one slept with Adam outside of his exorcists, but I did manage to get Alastor back to Hell as swiftly as I could in order to have him covertly assisting Charlie."

"How? If you wouldn't let him at the hotel, then how does that help?"

"Destabilise the Overlords, be more lenient about the souls on his chains trying out the hotel, spread information about the place in a covert manner that wouldn't get a target on you, so many underhanded things my dear. Though, I am glad he disobeyed... I hadn't realised how little you understood of management and staffing."

"Heh, yeah... it was the best we had."

"Charlotte, you could have ordered palace staff to come and help at the hotel, you were always too kind."

"Oh, I dismissed them when you left with Charlie..." Lucifer adds, sheepishly.

"It seems there is a lot I need to do in the interim, then." Lillith sighed. "Alastor, would you be open to helping me manage these tasks, even without the deal in place?"

"...I kept the last hotel together with magical duct tape and elbow grease, it's a matter of pride now to continue in the role." Alastor shrugs, as if unconcerned. The collar shatters with a snap of elegant pale fingers. "Thank you... now, what was it you needed seen to? I will need to schedule in a few hours to go and tear the Vees limb from limb, but outside of that, my calendar's quite open."

"Wait, we need to discuss everything we just learned! I have questions!"

"Later, Charlotte. Now is the time for action..." Alastor replies, radio dial eyes flaring, already planning on how he would prepare the Vees for dinner.

"How dare you talk to our daughter that way, Alastor, deer?" Lillith teases, tugging at his ear and laughing as he snaps his teeth at her fingers. "Oh, don't fight in front of Charlotte, she'll end up with a complex or something..."

"On top of her glaring daddy issues you mean?"

Alastor doesn't like the way Lucifer's expression goes from furious to cold, cruel delight in a heartbeat. "Well, it's on you to fix now as well, bellhop... seeing as you claimed her too. So, how about some..." the world seemed o slow down like a horror movie, "Family... therapy...?"

"...If you'll excuse me, I'm going to beg Vox to kill me."

Charlie leaps for him, "No, he's kidding!"

"So am I, Charlotte... do take a breath. Your parents are apparently comedians this afternoon, and I think we'd all best steer clear of them until whatever madness has swept over them, passes. Now, would you like to come and watch me dismember an overlord? You and Vagathat could even tag-team Velvette if you wished..."

Vaggie looks like she might pass out.

His ears flatten. "Ah, I believe I hit another slang term and I'm not going to like what it really means... am I?"

Lucifer curls half his wings around the Overlord, as one might companionably sling an arm over their shoulder if they were at comparable heights. Clearly having decided that he can torment the other better if he REALLY leans into this madness between them all.

He steers the deer towards the corridor as Lillith follows behind, unwilling to miss the fuss.

"Well, you're gonna love this, Al... husbando nuero uno, honey, deerly beloved, blood moon of our life..." Laying it on thick, but Al looked ready to claw his own ears off with each passing endearment. "...but tag-teaming used to mean fighting in tandem, and now it means-..."

The door clicks shut, but seconds later every radio in the c=vinciity blasts an air raid siren and something that sounds mysteriously like a clown falling down the stairs.

Charlie counts to ten, breathing hard.

"What the fuck is my life...?" she whispers.

Vaggie consoles her as best she can, tossing up if Charlie outweighed the insanity of her family enough to propose. She blanches, momentarily, imagining having to ask Lucifer and Lillith and Alastor's permission, before catching herself.

Sure just the first two, right?

Right?

But then she recalled the look in the royal couple's eye, and their infamous penchant for committing to the bit... and resigned herself to like, dragging a sinner home and offering it to the deer for his blessing. Or something insane like that.

"No matter what, I love you, Charlie..." she murmurs externally. "Let's go take a walk in the garden to calm down, okay?"

"...yeah, I could use fresh air after all this."

There'd be so much to talk about later, so much to ask... but for now?

Charlie needed cuddles and connection.

And, based on the sounds downstairs, someone needed a first aid kit or a priest... so they'd be taken the back staircase to avoid all that. The smoke alarms began to blare.

Vaggie tugged Charlie away from the choas just a little faster.

----------

no idea where this was going, it spiralled on me

it could be funny tho

[blookitty]

In before Ted posts it I'm sure, but Failure got bought by alief! 🥳🎉🍾

[solxamber]

Maybe a Skully request for him learning the reader's birthday is really close to Halloween? I just think he'd get excited to hear the reader's had a Halloween themed birthday every year because of it, and due to it not being ON Halloween its like having two in 1 year, would absolutely be his dream if he doesn't already do that

Skully J. Graves x Reader

I'm so sorry for the wait, I hope you like it <3

You casually mention your birthday while lounging in Ramshackle, almost as an afterthought. "Oh, yeah. My birthday’s next week. It’s always super close to Halloween, so I’ve had a Halloween-themed party almost every year."

Skully, who was dramatically arranging some black and white decorations in the room (for "aesthetic purposes"), suddenly freezes. He turns toward you slowly, his eyes widening with a mixture of awe and reverence. He drops the cobweb-covered garland he’s holding and rushes to your side in an over-the-top theatrical flourish, coat sweeping across the floor.

“What did you say?!” he asks, his voice high, almost like you’ve revealed some ancient secret.

You blink at him. “Uh...my birthday’s next week?”

“And every year…” He leans closer, eyes locked on yours like you just said the most magical thing in the world. “...it’s Halloween-themed?!”

Grim, who’s curled up in front of the fire with a snack, snorts. “Pffft. Why’s that such a big deal? We don’t even get extra tuna just ‘cause it’s spooky time.”

Skully completely ignores Grim, focusing all his energy on you. “This is...this is...this is the dream.” He grabs your hand and dramatically bows over it, pressing a kiss to the back of it. “You’ve been living my ideal life all this time, and I never knew! You, my friend, have been blessed with not just one, but two Halloweens every year!”

He gets this far-off, dreamy look in his eyes, as if he’s envisioning a world where he, too, has two Halloweens, one on your birthday and one on the actual holiday. "A prelude Halloween, and then the real Halloween...It’s a masterpiece of planning, a work of art." He lets out a breathy sigh, “Jack Skellington himself would be proud!”

“I mean, it’s not that big of a deal…” you try, but Skully’s already on another planet, his face lighting up like a jack-o’-lantern.

“Do you know what this means?!” He suddenly grabs both of your shoulders, eyes wide with the joy of someone who’s just unlocked the key to eternal happiness. “We can have TWO Halloween parties in a row! One in your honor, and then the official Halloween! Two nights of pure, spooky glory!” He releases you, spins dramatically, and gestures around the room. “The decorations, the costumes, the endless dark colors—just think about it! It’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of!”

Grim rolls his eyes, crunching loudly on his snack. “Yeah, yeah. And where’s my tuna in all of this? I’m not seein’ how this benefits me.”

Skully waves his hand dismissively at Grim. “You’ll get all the tuna you want, little furball. We’re talking about a double Halloween extravaganza! This is bigger than any feast of fish!”

Grim’s ears perk up. “Double the tuna, huh?”

“I said parties, not tuna,” you point out, but Grim’s already on board.

“Yeah, yeah, let’s go with double the parties, double the snacks,” Grim says, throwing in his vote for this wild plan. “I’ll bring the fireworks.”

You groan, pinching the bridge of your nose. “No fireworks inside the dorm, Grim.”

Skully looks ready to faint from excitement. “Imagine it...we’ll start with a pre-Halloween bash for your birthday. Dark, moody decorations, not a single bright color in sight. No candy—just the eerie emptiness of true Halloween spirit.” He twirls around, his cape billowing behind him. “Then, on the real Halloween, we’ll raise the stakes even higher. There will be no sugar. No colors. Only shadows.”

Grim looks horrified. “Wait, no candy?! That’s...that’s sacrilege! You can’t have a Halloween without candy!”

Skully turns to Grim, his voice deadly serious. “The only true treat...is fear.”

Grim groans. “Ugh, you’re the worst.”

Skully turns back to you with a grin. “What do you say? Two Halloweens! Double the spooky goodness, twice the amount of dark, colorless celebration...”

You laugh, watching the pure joy radiating from Skully. “You’re absolutely obsessed.”

“I am obsessed!” he says proudly, puffing out his chest. “You are living proof that Halloween is not confined to one day. It is a lifestyle, a way of being. And now, you and I...we shall celebrate that lifestyle together. Forever!”

Grim mutters something about “weirdos” and “no candy,” but you just shake your head, feeling both exhausted and entertained by Skully’s antics.

“Well,” you say with a grin, “I guess I’d better start planning for two spooky parties this year.”

Skully nearly faints from happiness. “This...this is everything I’ve ever wanted!”

Grim groans dramatically. “Great. Two days of weirdos and no candy. Can’t wait.”

Skully, in all his dramatic, Halloween-obsessed glory, was in for a treat. And now, you’ve somehow roped yourself into throwing a double Halloween bash. Lucky you.

Masterlist

[cainfile]

pt.2 to my angsty loser!ellie drabble 𝜗𝜚

nsfw! ellie gets caught and that’s literally it. i hate this so bad but it’s whateva

(part 3 will have lesbian gay lesbian boob vagina butt sex i promise. no more ellie masturbating)

find pt.1 here! & pt.3 here :3

daily click! don’t buy tlou free palestine

after ellie’s pathetic masturbation sesh, she vowed to herself to fucking pull it together.

she wasn’t gonna let herself mope over you, because she knew you had an active sex life. she forced herself to be fine with it. to be fine with the people you decided to bring to your bed. she wanted to be near you without feeling this suffocating feeling of yearning and lust filling her insides.

and if that meant tucking her feelings to the deepest pits of hell, then so fucking be it.

a few weeks had passed since that little moment you and ellie had. the one where she had showed up to your house in the middle of you hooking up with someone.

the morning after, she has awoken to a string of texts from you, all apologizing for that awkward moment.

11:34pm

ellie i’m so sorry you had to see me like that. i didn’t mean to come off rude.

i wanted to go after you but i couldn’t really leave her alone in my house lol

els?

i’m really sorry. i hope u don’t think you can’t come to my house ever again ☹️ i actually thought it was sweet you showed up like that.

2:12am

goodnight ellie. i hope things aren’t awkward between us.

god, you made her feel awful. you were too fucking sweet to her. the way you never missed a single night when telling her goodnight, even after something like that. she rubbed her swollen face, mainly from crying, and typed a short message to you.

9:47am

hey, sorry for rushing away like that. idk why i did that lmfao

and things aren’t awkward at all, i shouldn’t have just showed up unnanounced

no els seriously! you should do that more often. tbh i wanted to hang out with you more than that girl… but yk i couldn’t 💔💔

she smiled at your kind text, glad that you two could just put it behind yourselves. her moment of relief was quickly replaced by disgust, when she saw the state of herself and her bed. her inner thighs sticky with dried cum, and her sheets below her still damp with all the extra release.

“gross..” she mumbled to herself, getting up and immediately throwing on some boxers and a tshirt, feeling way too vulnerable being naked like that. she went to the bathroom and cleaned herself up, then threw her sheets in the wash.

since then, you two have been fine. you do your weekly hangout sessions, where you grab food and talk about anything for hours on end. it’s almost as if nothing happened.

until one of your sleepovers.

you always convinced ellie to spend the night at your house, at least every other week. whenever it’d get dark outside and ellie would start to get up, you’d give her that irresistible pout and “ughhh, c’mon els.. just spend the night. it’s too dark out for you to go home.”

and every damn time, she agreed. how could she ever say no to you?

one night, you and ellie are high out of your minds, talking about god knows what. all giggly and soft, you two exchange jokes and stories that really make no sense. but, to you two, it’s the funniest thing in the world. after a laughing fit between the two of you, you wipe your tears and sigh.

“god, i love you.”

you say, still catching your breath from that tummy tensing laugh. the words were just an expression of admiration for her. but to ellie, they were so much more.

“i love you too.”

she says, looking you in the eyes. she’s high, so she’s not thinking too hard about how sincere she sounds. but she really should’ve, because that soft tone of her voice and the glint in her eyes make it sound way too fucking real.

“woah,” you let out a nervous, breathy chuckle. “that was a bit theatrical.”

“wh..what do you mean?”

ellie asks, getting a bit nervous. she’s not her usual, stuttery self though. she keeps it together. thanks to the weed.

“just the way you said i love you. it felt like… deep.”

you move your hands as you talk, and ellie just shrugs. but she knows she’s fucked. before she could stop her feelings from resurfacing, she gets that familiar tingle in her belly and pounding of her heart.

“shut up,” she rolls her eyes, trying to play it off.“you’re dramatic.”

her voice wavered with those last words. fuck, her voice wavered. why did she feel like she was gonna have a breakdown any second now? she had to get the hell away from you.

“gotta piss. be back in a bit.”

ellie says quickly, so quick you don’t even have time to retort to her calling you dramatic. you just sit there, confused. you could’ve sworn you heard some uncertainty in her voice, but you let her go.

meanwhile, ellie made a beeline for your bathroom. she shut the door and leaned her head against the wood. she let out a deep sigh, trying to calm herself. the fact that she felt the most intense feeling that she couldn’t even describe over a mere “i love you” had her cringing.

she just couldn’t get over you. the entire night, she tried her best not to think about how good your tits looked in your pajama top, or how badly she wanted to just shove her face into your ass in those little shorts.

her thinking over these details led to the predicament that she’s in right now. sweatpants around her knees, legs slightly spread as she rubs one out while leaned up against your bathroom sink. her eyes are shut and her head is thrown back, letting out the quietist grunts she could muster.

she knew she shouldn’t be doing this, she promised herself that she would stop. but god, you made it hard. she was so wet, it made her cheeks flush red. the simple thought of you had her literally dripping around her own fingers.

you were still in your room, biting your thumbnail as you wait for ellie. you start to get worried, thinking you made her upset by commenting on how she said ‘i love you’. so, you being the thoughtful friend you are, go to check on her.

you quietly walk to the bathroom, putting your ear against the door. you were going to knock and mutter a little “els? are you okay?”, but the sounds you heard made you lose all the words in your mouth.

soft, sharp inhales and tiny sticky noises is all you can hear through the door. it’s a bit hard to listen to, since the soft buzz of the yellow light in there overpowers it. what the hell is she doing in there?

you knew this was wrong. an invasion of privacy to the max. but your curiosity was getting the better of you, and you were worried. you put your hand on the doorknob and slightly twisted it, not expecting it to open. but it did.

did ellie forget to lock the door?

ellie doesn’t hear the soft click of the door opening, too lost in her own pleasure as she practically humps her own hand. it had been too fucking long since she could touch herself to the thought of you. her only guilty pleasure.

her head was still thrown back, eyes squeezed shut as she rubbed her clit at a shockingly fast pace. and you saw it all. you had opening the door just enough for half of your face to see through the opened crack. your whole body froze at the sight in front of you.

she was so captivating. her face looking all fucked out, her pale thighs that were so tensed up, the shininess of her slick that smeared on the heel of her palm. even the quick glimpses of her gorgeous auburn bush that you could see if her hoodie rode up enough.

your tummy felt weird. first, you felt guilty for eavesdropping on your best friend. second, you were confused why the fuck ellie decided now would be the best time to masturbate. third, you were turned on. disgustingly turned on, at that.

a few seconds of watching ellie made your panties get all sticky and wet, and that burning hot feeling in your lower belly. you couldn’t look away.

“ohh, fuck— please,”

your brain short circuited hearing ellie say that. god, she was so lost in her own pleasure. so lost that she accidentally knocked over your toothbrush and hand soap on the sink, causing her to jolt and snap her eyes open.

she looks down at the bottle of soap and toothbrush that landed in front of the bathroom door. the door that’s cracked. her eyes shoot up, and there’s where she sees a glimpse of you running away. a quick flash, but she knew it was you.

she is so fucked.

I HATE RHISNSO BAD RRRR😡

btw i finished this literally like 3 days ago and didn’t wanna post it hut i did anyway ☺️☺️

[astrolynnworld]

Can I have a Chris fluff where he lifts the readers bump?

baby bump

pairings: chris x reader

summary: your back has been killing your active pregnancy. chris does whatever he can to relive that ache

warnings: fluff, pregnancy, sad thoughts, reassurance, comfort, love

a/n: in this fic, you and chris are already married

word count: 662

it’s been almost 8 months since i found out that chris & i were having a baby girl.

i wanted to do the whole gender reveal theatrics but chris and i both agreed that we did not want to wait.

when we revealed the pregnancy to our family and friends, it was like endless masses of support.

everyone congratulated us, gave us money, sent gifts, and offered endless hours of help.

there are still gifts coming into this day.

although the pregnancy is starting to overwhelm me.

The cravings, the nausea, the headaches, and the pain that finds itself everywhere, especially my back.

it’s so hard for me to do the tasks that I once enjoyed.

I feel bad for chris because a once active wife had probably just become a burden to him.

I hated this thought, but I was left with no other choice when I would see Chris pick up everything that I used to do.

he was switched to start working at home so he could take care of me, our baby, and our home.

tonight I thought I would surprise him by making dinner to reward him for all his generosity and support with our new lifestyle that I was trying to adjusted too.

he had went to the store to go pick up a few items for the house that we have been needing, so i took this moment as an opportunity.

half an hour into cooking, my back starts to ache really badly. i decide to sit because i realize that i had been standing for a while

I take a five minute break, but this does not stop the ache.

I get back up to finish dinner since i had only had a few more steps left to complete in the recipe.

but, as im finishing up i hear keys start to unlock the door along with bags tussling as footsteps enter the house.

“babe?” chris calls out

“im in the kitchen” i respond

he follows the sound of my voice

“babe what are you doing? you’re supposed to be resting.” his voice says laced with concern

“i just wanted to surprise you with someone special. you’ve been doing a lot for me and i want to show you my gratitude” i say back in a soft tone

“baby.. you’re pregnant with our kid right now. do you really think you’re the one that needs to be showing gratitude to me?” he asks with a soft smirk

i smile at his rhetorical question

“i will never be able to show you enough gratitude for how much you mean to me and how lucky i am that you stick beside me everyday” he says while wrapping his hands around my back to give me a tight hug

i coo at the added pressure

“im sorry, did that hurt?” he asks with concern

“no, you’re fine. my back has just been aching all day.” i complain

“can i try something?” he asks

i nod my head yes with a bit of confusion.

he gently puts his hands under my belly and lifts its slowly.

the released pressure on my back and pelvis felt like heaven.

i drop my head on his shoulder as a sign of relief.

“i did not know about this relief tactic” i state with shock laced in my tone

“yeah. i did my research about the do’s and don’t’s with a pregnancy wife!” chris replies

i laugh at his humor

“i love you so much christopher.” i say as i lift my head up and look into his eyes

“i love you so much much y/n” he responds back.

he bends his head down to give me a kiss on the lips.

“now lets turn off this stove and get you into bed. you did enough for tonight.” he says while switching off the stove letting the, now cooked, food shimmer down.

he grabs my hand and guides me back to our bedroom.

———————————————————————

a/n: this was so cute to write, i loved it! hope you guys love as well

[soonyoungs]

hiii love ur writing!! if you can, could you write for ot13 or your bias' reaction to their s/o kissing them on a variety show or live broadcast? (+ their relationship is public and accepted hehe) thankyouu!!

hi there angel, i appreciate you so, so much! i’m so sorry this took forever but i hope you like it! 🥺♡︎

scoups: how dare you! he’s meant to be the big, tough leader and now you’ve reduced him to complete mush. he’s staring at you with soft, glowing eyes and a small pout on his lips. he knows there’s no way he can recollect himself enough to bring him back to full leader mode, not with how his cheeks are glowing dark red and everyone mercilessly teasing him 

jeonghan: smug, smug, smug! smirking into the kiss, fingers twitching as he resists the urge to pull you in, deeper. continues to smirk as you return to your seat and get settled back in. makes a show of running his thumb over his bottom lip as he looks in to the camera.

joshua: confused! freezes in place thinking you’re planning to trick him or do something for the show, but when you lean in and kiss him he softens and gives you a kiss back. ears turning red as he pretends to be cool and suave. waving a hand to thank everyone when the studio claps and cheers.

jun: stunned! eyes wide open, mouth puckered and completely frozen to his seat. he was not expecting this from you. his brain is completely fried and will be speaking in stutters and incoherent sentences for the rest of the program.

hoshi: he’s so giddy that you’re kissing him he forgets his current situation. gives you smalls pecks back all while letting out loud giggles. when you’ve had your fill and move away from him he wipes the excess spit from his moth with the back of his hand, feet wiggling the entire time.

wonwoo: doesn’t see it coming. literally. he’s not wearing his glasses so when you move in to kiss him he almost dodges you completely. it’s only when he feels your hands on his head, keeping him in place, does he realize what’s happening. let’s you kiss him as you please and when your finished he just can’t stop grinning

woozi: eyebrows immediately raised in surprise. he’s not overly physically affectionate, especially not publicly so he isn’t sure what to do or say. can’t help but go “oh?” when you release him from the smooch

dk: someone else who starts off confused and then just melts when you give him a soft kiss. a soft giggle leaves his mouth and he’s looking at you like you are his whole world. isn’t able to focus on anything else because he’s too busy staring at you, touching his lips, or quietly giggling to himself. ends up needing your help to complete the show

mingyu: flustered of course. he’s incredibly affectionate so he has no issues with your kiss, but he is incredibly easy to embarrass. ears are red as soon as you move in close to him. constant whispers of shy “why? why? why?”s as you lean in. as soon as you give him a peck he’s kicking his feet back and forth, his entire body fidgeting giddily. continues to hold your hand and be as physically affectionate as possible 

the8: tries to stay calm but isn’t great at keeping a poker face. the minute you plant your lips on him to the time you release him his fingers are fidgeting and he’s trying to contain his happy laughter. 

seungkwan: the theatrics! he will be loud with his surprise. yelling about why would you do that, how he’s utterly embarrassed and now no one is going to take him seriously and also how he loves you and you’re so cute and sweet. cheeks are on fire and he’ll be huffing and puffing erratically for a while because he’s so overwhelmed.

vernon: slow to react, torn between wanting to kiss you back and preserving his idol image. avoiding eye contact with the hosts as he continually nods, pretending to listen to what’s being said to him while trying to process what just happened. 

dino: just happy to be here, honestly. equally parts thrilled that you’re confident enough to embrace him so publicly and embarrassed that you did it in front of his older brothers and everyone watching the program.

[swiftalchemy]

Gold Rush

Taylor Swift x fem!reader fluff

warnings: fluff, showering? baking?

summary: You and Taylor like a slow morning, especially if it involves a nice warm shower and some homemade pancakes!

word count: 1.8k

It was an early winter morning as the sunlight poured through the windows of your shared bedroom. You were snuggled up in your loving girlfriends arms, her embrace keeping you warm and safe.

She stirs slightly and notices you're now awake, "Hey, pretty girl..." she murmurs to you, "How'd you sleep, baby?"

"Pretty good..." you reply groggily, "How about you?" you ask her.

She wraps her arms a bit more around your waist, pulling you close as she gives you a light, sleepy morning kiss. She then yawns and responds, "Slept great... I always do when I'm next to you."

She gently runs her fingers through your hair, the touch gentle and comforting. She smiles as she continues to look at you, her eyes full of love and affection. "Mmm... I could get used to waking up like this every morning..."

“I think we could make that work…” you giggle and pull her into a soft kiss.

She happily melts into the kiss, her lips meeting yours with tenderness and affection. She pulls you closer, wrapping her arms around your waist as she deepens the kiss. She's completely content in this moment, enjoying the feeling of your warm body against hers.

As the kiss finally breaks, she lets out a satisfied sigh and looks into your eyes. Her expression is soft, loving, and utterly content. She brushes a strand of hair away from your face and smiles warmly at you. "I don't ever want to let you go, you know that?"

“I know that,” your tone softens with each word, “And I feel the same, you know?”

She smiles and nods, her heart swelling with love for you. She pulls you into a tight hug, nuzzling her face into your neck and inhaling your scent deeply.

"I never thought I'd find someone like you, someone who makes me feel so completely loved and cared for... You're my everything, baby..."

“You’ve written too many songs for me not to know.” you chuckle.

She laughs softly and grins at you, her eyes sparkling with amusement. She lets out a dramatic sigh and pretends to pout. "Oh really? Do I really write about you that much?"

“Hmm only the last… what? Four albums?”

She laughs again, shaking her head in mock offense. She playfully rolls her eyes and responds, "You exaggerate too much... it was only three albums, thank you very much."

“And you’re about to release the fourth one, thank you very much.” you mock her words.

She lets out a theatrical gasp, clutching her chest as if wounded. "Oh, alright, Miss know-it-all! Four albums then, if you're going to be that way about it." She laughs and pokes you in the side, unable to keep up her exaggerated act any longer.

“So… what’s your plans for today?” you ask her.

She hums as she thinks for a moment, her hand gently running up and down your arm. She lets out a content sigh before answering.

"Honestly, I don't really have any plans today... I was hoping I could just spend the day being lazy with you. Maybe stay in bed, watch movies, order some food, and just generally be as unproductive as humanly possible."

“Hm, sounds good…” you smile at her. Her golden hair followed around her face, her blue eyes were radiant with adoration. You take a breath, then sit up, “I’m gonna go shower, okay?”

She pouts playfully as you sit up, clearly disliking the idea of you leaving her side even for a moment. She grabs your wrist gently and jokingly tries to pull you back down to the bed.

"No, stay... don't leave me..." she whines dramatically, trying her best to keep a straight face.

“I’ll be gone for 10 minutes. Max. I promise you’ll be fine.” you grip her hand.

She pouts once again, not wanting to let you go. Suddenly, her face lights up with an idea, “Can we shower together?” she proposes.

“Not a bad idea at all…” you giggle and pull her into a peck, “Hurry up.”

She grins, feeling victorious. Without a moment's hesitation, she hops out of bed and grabs your hand, pulling you with her towards the bathroom. She's already shedding her clothes as she walks, clearly eager to get started.

"Don't have to tell me twice."

Once inside the bathroom, she turns on the water and begins adjusting the temperature to her liking. She looks over her shoulder at you, her eyes running over your body in a way that makes her intentions clear.

"It's ready, babe. Hop in whenever you're ready."

She climbs into the shower first, letting out a sigh of contentment as the warm water cascades over her body. She stands under the spray, waiting patiently for you to join her. As you enter, she immediately pulls you close, her arms wrapping around your waist as she presses a soft kiss to your shoulder.

“Hmm” you hum contently upon her, “I need to wash my hair, by the way.”

She nods, still nuzzling against your neck as she responds, "No problem, love. I'll help." She reaches over for the shampoo bottle and pumps some into her hand. Then, she starts gently massaging it into your hair, working the product into a nice, foamy lather.

As she works, she continues to press soft kisses to your neck and shoulder, enjoying getting a chance to pamper you a bit. She runs her fingers through your hair, massaging your scalp and making sure every strand is well-covered in the suds.

After a few minutes, she stops and pulls you back under the shower spray, rinsing the shampoo from your hair. She can't help but run her fingers through your hair as the water washes away the suds, enjoying the feeling of the silky strands slipping through her fingers.

Once your hair is clean, she takes her time washing the rest of your body, taking care to be gentle and thorough. She runs her soapy hands over your curves, appreciating every inch of you. As she works, she steals the occasional kiss, her lips warm and soft against your skin.

Once you're both clean, she turns off the water and grabs a soft towel to dry you off. She takes her time patting you dry, her touch gentle and affectionate. Once you're dry, she grabs another towel and quickly dries herself off before wrapping it around her, still not wanting to leave you alone for even a moment.

She wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you close, resting her forehead against yours. She looks into your eyes, a lazy, content smile on her face.

"You know... that was a great way to start the day."

“It really was” you happily sigh.

She grins and pecks you on the lips, still holding you close to her body. "And the day's just getting started, babe... we've got plenty of more fun to have before the day's over."

She plants a trail of soft kisses along your neck and collarbone, teasing you softly. "So... what do you want to do first, huh? Have some breakfast? Watch some movies? Or maybe we can just get back into bed for a bit..."

“Let’s get dressed, then do breakfast. We’ve started off the day, may as well continue, right?”

She laughs and nods, reluctantly agreeing to your plan.

"You're right, you're right. Fine, I suppose we should be productive at some point this morning."

She steps out of the shower and grabs her clothes, beginning to get dressed.

After a few minutes, she's fully dressed in a cozy casual outfit. She turns to look at you as you're still getting dressed, her eyes lingering on you hungrily. She can't help but appreciate your beautiful body as it's slowly covered up.

Once you're fully dressed, she intertwines her fingers with yours and leads you out of the bedroom. As you make your way to the kitchen, she speaks up with a smile,

"So... what do you feel like eating for breakfast, baby?"

“Whatever you want, I’m fine with, Tay.”

She ponders for a moment, a small smirk on her face. "Hmm... how about pancakes? I've been craving some good pancakes lately."

“Mhm. Sounds good.”

She grins, heading into the kitchen and setting out the ingredients she needs to make the pancakes. She begins mixing the batter, making sure to include plenty of chocolate chips for extra sweetness. As she works, she glances over her shoulder at you.

"Come here, I need your help with something."

She reaches out her hand, gesturing for you to come closer. Once you're within reach, she pulls you into her arms, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to your forehead.

"Can you grab the utensils for me, babe?"

Once you've grabbed the requested tools, she takes them from you and continues mixing the batter. As she works, she hums a little tune, her voice soft and sweet.

"You're a lifesaver, you know that? Couldn't make pancakes without you."

Once the batter is ready, she heats up a griddle and begins pouring dollops of the batter onto it. The pancakes sizzle and bubble on the hot surface, their golden-brown faces becoming more and more perfectly round. The smell of sweet maple syrup and chocolate fills the air.

She flips each pancake as it browns on the outside, her movements smooth and practiced. After a few minutes, she's stacked a small pile of fluffy, chocolate-chip pancakes on a plate. She grins and turns to you, holding up the plate with a proud smile.

"Ta-da! Pancakes are served, my love."

“They look amazing, Tay. Thank you.”

She grins, clearly pleased with your compliment. She sets the pancakes on the table and pours a generous helping of maple syrup over them, adding the finishing touch.

"Of course, babe. Anything for you. Now sit down and dig in before they get cold."

She sits down across from you at the table, her eyes fixed on you greedily as she watches you take the first bite. She waits eagerly for your reaction, hoping you'll enjoy the pancakes as much as she enjoyed making them for you.

A satisfied smile crosses her face as you let out a soft moan of approval. She grins and leans forward in her chair, resting her chin in her hands as she watches you take another bite.

"Mmm... good, huh? Told you it was a great idea."

You reply, “They’re amazing.”

She grins, clearly pleased with herself. She takes a bite of her own pancakes, savoring the sugary, chocolaty goodness.

"Thanks, babe." she replies, her mouth half-full of pancake.

After a few minutes, the plate of pancakes has been devoured and both of you are feeling quite full and satisfied. You sit in comfortable silence, admiring each others company.

“What must it be like to grow up that beautiful?” 

[charlottesbookclub]

easy love (eddie munson x f!reader) 🖤🖤

for my dear @theold-ultraviolence because you deserve a nice day with eddie 🥰🥰

Summary: you and eddie attend the county fair near hawkins

Warnings/Tags: femme!reader (terms like "my lady" are used, but there are no physical descriptors); absolute pure tooth-rotting fluff; I think that's it, but as always, let me know if I've missed anything! ☺️

Words: 2857

Recommended Listening: Easy Love – Parris Mitchell

Helpful Info:

Beholder – a monster from dungeons and dragons that looks like a giant floating eye

Funnel Cake – a sweet fried dessert that is a staple at US fairs (I'm sure they're eaten elsewhere as well, but to me they're very much associated with the fair ☺️)

Author’s Note: eddie isn't a character that I've written a lot for, so I hope this feels in-character for him 🥰💕 I've mostly written this for a dear friend who deserves a little treat (ily irma 🥰🖤), but I hope it can find anyone who might need a fluffy little pick-me-up ☺️🥰 also it is a complete coincidence that the "easy love" lyric video features a ferris wheel – I had never watched the video until I was finding the link to put here after I'd already finished the fic and was prepping the post 🤯🤯 guess it just proves that this was meant to be 😌💖 as always, I hope y'all enjoy! ☺️💕

            The scent hit you the instant you popped open the passenger side door of Eddie’s van and prepared to jump out: dust and sugar and animals and fried food and sweat. A unique combination of smells that heralded your arrival at the county fair. Before you could push yourself off the worn leather seat, Eddie came sprinting around the front of the van.

            “Hold up waitwaitwaitwait,” he ushered you back into your seat. “This is a date, right? I’m supposed to get the door for you.”

            “Oh, I didn’t know I was being courted by such a chivalrous gentleman,” you laughed. “Please, Sir Eddie, continue,” you invited as you pulled the door closed again. The next second, he opened it once more with a dramatic flourish and deep bow.

            “My Lady, your humble suitor awaits the honor of your hand,” Eddie said in a terrible posh accent before offering his hand for you to take. You couldn’t help but laugh at his theatrics as you maneuvered yourself out of the van, using his hand for stability as your feet hit the dusty ground of the lot. He shoved the door closed with a practiced kick, but did not release your hand as the two of you began walking toward the fair entrance.

            “Munson, was this whole thing a ploy so you could hold my hand?” you asked in teasing accusation, holding up your still-linked hands as proof of your claim. Eddie’s deep brown eyes widened in mock surprise as though seeing your intertwined fingers for the first time.

            “You would accuse me – your loyal and devoted knight – of beguiling you?” he gasped in exaggerated shock.

            “Oh I just might,” you giggled, knocking your shoulder against his as he tried to dodge the movement – a difficult endeavor considering that he still refused to let go of your hand. He then pulled himself back toward you, pressing his mouth close to your ear, his dark curls tickling your skin.

            “And you might be correct,” he whispered, an edge of barely-contained laughter in his voice, “but don’t tell anyone else my secret – I have a reputation to maintain, you know.” You nodded with mock seriousness and mimed zipping your lips and throwing away the key. 

            “Your secrets are safe with me—oh look: cows!” you interrupted your own sentence as you passed a small round barn and caught a glimpse of the animals within. Switching direction, you pulled Eddie toward the entrance. 

            It was cooler in the barn, shielded from the sun and with huge box fans blowing from the rafters. The sweet smell of hay and dusty scent of the cows lingered in the air as the two of you made your way down one of the rows of animals. 

            You stopped at the stall of a particularly sweet looking cow, her mostly cream-colored face flecked with brown as she slowly chewed some hay. You reached your free hand out gently and touched the soft patch of fuzz on her forehead. Seeming to like the gesture, she nuzzled her wet nose against your palm, and you giggled. Her expressive, soft, deep brown eyes reminded you of something, and it only took you a second to realize what.

            “Look Eds, you’ve got the same eyes!”

            Eddie rolled his own chocolatey eyes, but stepped closer to the cow nonetheless. He reached out a tentative hand to stroke her head like you had, and when his hand met her fur, he let out a noise of surprise.

            “Oh – it’s really soft!” he exclaimed. Almost as though in response, the cow let out a low moo and pushed her nose against Eddie’s outstretched hand just as she had to yours. He pulled his hand back abruptly, wiping it down the front of his shirt. “Ewww – it’s wet!”

            “The great knight Eddie, laid low by the wet nose of a cow,” you lamented in feigned sorrow, shaking your head mournfully.

            “Hey! How was I supposed to know it would feel like that?” he retorted, unable to keep the light sparkle of a laugh out of his voice. “You’re right though – about the eyes. I thought you were joking, but I take it as a great compliment to share eyes with this noble beast.”

            “Of course I meant it as a compliment, silly” you knocked your shoulder against his again, much more gently this time, “you know I couldn’t resist either of you, looking at me with those sun-warmed melted-chocolate eyes. Practically got me in a trance.”

            “Then you wouldn’t argue if I suggested we go try some games?”

            “I wouldn’t have argued anyway, but now I’m going to need some convincing – show me what those big brown eyes can do.”

            With a great deal of theatricality, Eddie brushed his curls back and bent slightly to make sure he could look up at you properly. He drew his mouth into a little pout and widened his eyes, ribbons of gold and deeper brown visible in the warm sea of his milk chocolate irises, even in the dim light of the barn.

            “Please?” he begged in the most pathetic voice he could manage without breaking into laughter.

            “Of course!” you responded, laughing, and Eddie instantly snapped back to his full height, joining in your giggles. The cow mooed again and rocked her head to the side, almost as though telling you two to get out of the barn and enjoy the rest of the fair.

            “See?” Eddie pointed to the cow, “she thinks so too!” He popped a small salute at the cow as you rolled your eyes and pulled him back out of the barn. From there, he led the way as you wound through gaggles of sticky children, packs of sweaty teens, and pairs of exhausted parents. Your hand was growing incredibly warm in Eddie’s firm grip, but you didn’t mind at all. You were happy to let him guide you through the crowd to whatever game he had his heart set on.

            He finally came to a stop outside one of the many colorful tents that populated the fair. Under this one was a large table, covered from edge to edge in glass bowls, some of which had goldfish in them.

            “You’re not serious?” 

            “On the contrary, I’m the most serious. Other guys are winning their girlfriends weird stuffed bears and lame plastic roses. I want to get you something cool!”

            “Eds, that is so sweet, but you know this game is so rigged, right? One of my friends spent all their tickets on it last year and never got a fish.”

            “Well, lucky for me, I’m different, and I’m going to win my girlfriend a fish,” he huffed with exaggerated bravado and another theatrical bow. You laughed despite yourself and shook your head with bemused affection as you stepped back and watched him exchange a couple tickets for a handful of rings.

            He lined up each throw carefully, holding the little plastic rings lightly in his hand as he flexed his wrist back and forth, preparing for the toss. The first few landed well, but on the exterior bowls that were filled with decorative rocks and crumples of colorful paper. The points could be added up for smaller prizes, but he rejected those, opting to pay a few more tickets for another set of rings. You could see him hitting his stride, these rings landing closer to the center, some even bouncing off the edges of the bowls with real fish in them. With each near-miss you noticed him leaning forward in anticipation and then deflating a little as the ring failed to find its mark. You were about to walk back up to him and pull him gently away, tell him that you really didn’t need a fish; you couldn’t bear to see him disappointed.

            Before you could though, he handed a couple more tickets to the attendant in return for another set of rings. The first couple landed so close that you found yourself holding your breath a little, waiting to see if they would come to rest over a fishbowl. By the time he was down to his last one, you were determined not to let him waste any more tickets, and had begun to move towards him when he released the final ring with a measured flick of his wrist. The little circle of orange plastic sailed through the air and came to a perfect landing around the centermost glass bowl on the table – the one with the biggest fish. You stopped in your tracks, looking on in shock for a moment as the attendant went to remove the ring and transfer the fish to a little plastic bag. You snapped yourself out of your stupor and rushed the last few steps to Eddie, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug.

            “You actually did it!”

            “Of course I did – I promised you I would, didn’t I?” He struck a heroic pose, but underneath his exaggerated confidence, you could see relief, and perhaps even a little bit of surprise.

            The attendant handed the bag with the fish to Eddie, which he took with the utmost care. He then turned and presented it to you with a flurry of flourishing hand gestures and a series of deep and dramatic bows.

            “My Lady, in your name I have slayed the great Dragon of the Rings, and I present to you its great treasure!”

            “Sir Eddie!” you echoed his theatrics with an elaborate curtsy of your own, “I am honored and flattered by this great gift!” 

            You held out your hands with great seriousness, ready to receive the fish, and his placed the bag carefully into your waiting hands with a final bow. Picking up the top of the bag, you studied the little creature within. It was a shimmery golden-orange with feathery fins that trailed a little in the water and huge, bulging eyes that projected from either side of its head.

            “Hmmmm… now to think of a name for this little guy,” you murmured. Then an idea came to mind:

            “Beholder!” you exclaimed at the exact same moment as Eddie. A beat of surprised silence passed before you both broke into peals of laughter.

            “It’s the eyes, isn’t it?” you wheezed.

            “Yeah – it’s the eyes,” Eddie agreed in gasping breaths between laughs.

            “Shall we take our new son Beholder to see the rest of the fair?” you asked when you had both recovered a bit.

            “After you, my lady,” Eddie gestured for you to lead the way.

            Your first stop was the fun house where Eddie had to guide you through the spinning tunnel painted with black and white spirals since you kept losing your balance. Despite the dizzying swirls that kept causing you to trip, you relished the casual closeness of Eddie behind you, his arms pressed against yours as you held Beholder to your chest, gently directing you through the tunnel. At the end you held Beholder up to the series of distorted mirrors, both of you dying of laughter when the warped surfaces made his buggy eyes even bigger than they already were. 

            Next up was a food cart selling funnel cakes. Your comment that the pile of fried dough resembled guts resulted in you and Eddie pretending to be orcs consuming the entrails of a slain enemy. The little container of raspberry jam that accompanied the funnel cake made this all the more convincing, as it proved to be a sticky but delicious fake blood that Eddie slathered over the fried treat. Beholder watched from his bag on the old wooden picnic table, eyes wide as you both took turns dramatically ripping pieces from the cake with your fingers and dipping them in even more jam.

            Satisfied with your meal of the viscera of your enemy, you both returned to the games, taking turns holding Beholder while the other played. You won a little bear while picking ducks and Eddie got a small plastic sword at the dart toss. You only had a couple tickets left as the sun was beginning to sink toward the horizon and the heat of the day was fading to a more comfortable evening.

            “Wanna spend our last tickets on the ferris wheel?” Eddie asked.

            “Sure! If you don’t think it will make the baby too sick…” you replied with feigned seriousness, stroking Beholder’s bag protectively. You couldn’t keep up the act long though, and both of you devolved into laughter as you made your way toward the large circular structure at the back of the fair.

            When you were both settled in your seat and the creaking metal frame lurched to life, you watched as the little carriage slowly lifted from the loading area and into the air. Glancing over at Eddie, you found him looking anxious, his long fingers fidgeting with the rings on his hands.

            “Hey Eds, you good?”

            “Can I tell you a secret?” he dodged your question, answering with one of his own instead.

            “Of course,” you pressed yourself closer to him on the metal seat. “You can tell me anything.” He smiled a small, nervous smile, turning his eyes back to his hands and letting his dark curls fall over his face.

            “I uh—I practiced at the ring toss for weeks to get it right. Wayne has all these old mugs and uh… well… I would set them out on the table and make little rings out of tinfoil. I think the weight was a little off from the real thing, but…�� he looked up at you finally, his big brown eyes rimmed with gold as they caught the glowing light of the setting sun, “I really wanted to get it right for you.”

            You were speechless. A thousand sentences started to form in your mind, all of which screamed I love you I love you I love you. But you couldn’t get any of them out. You opted for wrapping your hands around his, hoping the way your fingers intertwined with his said the words that you weren’t able to force from your mouth. They must have, because he just squeezed your hands like he understood and rested his head on top of yours as you tucked yourself against him.

            “This is… easy, y’know,” he said after a long moment as the carriage continued to climb toward the top of the wheel. He pulled back to look at you as he stumbled over his words: “Like… I thought it might be awkward or like weird or something, or that I wouldn’t feel like myself. But it just feels normal. Or right. Just easy I guess.”

            “Eddie Munson, are you calling me easy?” you clutched at your invisible pearls in mock horror.

            “Nononononono – that’s not what I meant at all I—” you cut off his stammering apology with a gentle finger to his lips.

            “I know, Eds. I was just teasing,” you assured him. “But I feel the same way. It’s just… nice. You’re right – it just feels easy to be with you like this.” You took a deep breath, closing your eyes for a moment before speaking again: “Now can I tell you a secret?”

            “Of course,” he repeated your words from earlier, beaming at you, “you can tell me anything.” You leaned in closely then, your noses almost touching, your quavering voice barely above a whisper.

            “I’d really like to kiss you right now.”

            You were so close you could hear the breath catch in his throat at your words. His heart had to be racing as fast as yours was, but now your blood was rushing in your ears and all you could hear was the sound of your own fevered heartbeat. You closed your eyes then, afraid you might start seeing spots if you kept them open. Leaning in, you sensed him doing the same. You could feel the warmth radiating from his skin. And then his lips were on yours. Soft. Tentative. Warm. Gentle. And so utterly overwhelming in best way possible. You couldn’t focus on anything but the feeling of his skin against yours, your mind a mess of color and sound – fireworks ignited by the touch of his lips against your own.

            Then the whole world lurched, and you snapped back into reality. The carriage had finally made its way to the top of the ferris wheel and had jolted as it reached the highest point. The fairgrounds spread out below you, strings of lights flickering to life as the evening sky faded to a welcoming lavender. The chiming music of the carousel floated up on a slight breeze as you watched the fair light itself up in sparkling bursts of green, blue, yellow, and red. High above the dust and heat and noise, it almost looked like something out of a fairytale.

            “Wow, you can see everything from up here,” you breathed, squeezing Eddie’s hands in yours.

            “Yeah, you really can,” he agreed. But when you turned back, he wasn’t looking at the scene below – his eyes were only for you. Almost without thinking, you pulled him back in to finish the kiss.

[wheeboo]

a night to remember | joshua hong

SYNOPSIS. in which a handsome stranger at the bar catches your attention. PAIRING. joshua hong x gn!reader (ft. twice's jihyo since she was the first person to pop up in my head) GENRE. fluff, suggestive, 1920s-ish au, one-night stand au, strangers to ?? WARNINGS. implied sexual content (no actual smut), mentions of cigarettes (reader+jihyo smokes cuz it was socially acceptable at the time) and alcohol, drinking, kissing WORD COUNT. 2.9k

notes: this is obviously based off this masterpiece of a song "a night to remember" by beabadoobee and laufey which i could never do justice but i hope you enjoy! i also impulsively wrote this whole thing btwn the hours of 12-3am so its pretty rushed oops 😭

The dim glow of the flickering marquee lights of the bar spill onto the rain-soaked streets outside, beckoning every passerby to enter into the hazy world of cigarette smoke and clinking glasses. Each swinging of the door releases a burst of warm, smoky air into the cool, drenched night. The air buzzes with the lively chatter of other people, mingling in with the sultry notes of the saxophone and the sweet melodies of the piano drifting through the heavy atmosphere of the bar.

Sat on a worn-out barstool, you bring a cigarette up to your lips and inhale deeply as your eyes flutter to a close, the smoke from the tip suspending in the air and mixing with the potent scent of whiskey also filling your lungs.

"Must you always sit like a boring bystander? Come on, we're here to have fun!" Jihyo stumbles her way right next to you, her sequined dress glistening under the lights like a kaleidoscope.

You only respond to her with a playful roll of your eyes. And with a wry smile, Jihyo plucks the cigarette from your fingers, taking a theatrical, languid drag of her own before flicking the ashes into an already well-worn tray.

You scoff lightly, taking out a fresh cigar. "Well, you already took me here without much of a choice."

Jihyo raises an eyebrow, her grin unwavering. "Afraid of a little fun?"

"Not afraid," You reply with a smirk, swiftly igniting the cigar and leaning back against the bar behind you. "Just comfortable observing the fun itself."

"If you're just going to sit there and look pretty, you might as well have someone to look pretty for, honey," Jihyo teases, her eyes momentarily scanning across the room.

A puff of smoke escapes your lips as you retort, "Easy for you to say."

"Life's too short to be a wallflower, Y/N!" Jihyo exclaims dramatically.

"The excitement will come when it wants to, not when I force it, honey," You reply cryptically.

Jihyo drinks the rest of the bourbon from your glass before taking one last, begging glance in your direction. When you don't seem to want to budge, she shoots you a faint, pert grin before turning away towards the dance floor, each step she takes accentuating the dramatic shake of her hips. You can't help but let out a low chuckle.

The bar was not usually a place where you found yourself willingly. Usually, you'd take the comfortable bubble of your place over the haughty energy of this any day. But tonight, for some reason, the familiar discomfort feels strangely comforting; and plus𑁋much to Jihyo's preference of unwinding𑁋you didn't have much of a choice either way.

From the side, you have the opportunity to simply watch. For example, there's a couple lost in each other's gaze sitting a few tables away from you. Maybe today is their first date, maybe they're rekindling a flame that has flickered in the past, or maybe they've been together for years, and this is their escape from the routines of life.

Then, down at the centre of the bar and close to the small stage at the front where a beautiful young woman stood with a microphone in front of her, there's a group of young friends sharing laughter of their own that gets lost in the music. It reaches your ears almost perfectly the more you focus on them, and it makes you smile to yourself𑁋you like seeing other people happy.

You turn yourself around on the barstool, facing the array of alcohol bottles that are all perfectly lined up together on the shelves. You cup your empty glass in your hands, swaying it lightly as the sounds of the ice clinking against the sides echo softly. The bartender who was perhaps metres away seems to notice your empty glass and gives you a nod, silently asking if you'd like a refill.

You raise your glass in acknowledgment. The bartender approaches up to you and reaches for a bottle with practiced ease, the amber liquid flowing smoothly into your glass once more.

But just as you were about to bring the cup to your lips, the sound of the door creaking open catches your attention. A new figure steps into the bar, their silhouette momentarily framed by the rain-soaked glow from outside, and you notice it's a man. A black fedora sits on his head, hiding away any view you could possibly have of his face, and he wore an elegant black suit with a bow tie that seems to glisten with a subtle sheen against the lighting of the bar.

It wasn't until he takes off his fedora that you realise you just can't seem to stop staring at him, even with all the people brushing past him like he doesn't exist and the hectic activity of the bar. His blonde hair is perfectly styled and coiffed, his features gentle yet carrying an air of both mystery and familiarity. It's almost as if you've seen him before, but nothing particular in your mind rings a bell. Perhaps while walking down the street, across the quiet room of the city's library, or something as ridiculous as your past life, his face might have crossed your path at some point.

You watch the way he scans the room, appearing a bit lost but also intrigued, as if he's searching for something or someone.

And when he eventually lets his eyes sweep across the room and to the bar, his eyes lock onto yours like a snap, and it's enough to send a subtle shiver down your spine. The air seems to thicken for a moment, and you couldn't tell if it was the hint of alcohol in your system that's playing with your vision or something else. His lips play into a slight smile as his eyes hold yours, and he puts his fedora back on, before you lose track of him in the crowd in a sudden blink.

You find yourself briefly dazed, spinning around to face the bar once more. You're quick to grab onto your glass once more, seeing the way your reflection sways in the amber liquid as you take a moment to collect yourself. All it took was one look to have your head spinning and your heart racing with a man you probably would never see again.

"What can I get for you?" the voice of the bartender catches your attention.

You glance up to answer. "Oh, I don't need𑁋"

"Just two waters, please."

At the corner of your eye, a black fedora sets itself down on the counter next to you. You turn, and there he is𑁋the man from earlier, standing with a confident yet intriguing demeanour. The bartender nods and gets to work, pouring two glasses of water.

The man turns to you, eyes dark like the night itself. "Mind if I join you?" he asks, a subtle tilt to his lips. His voice is smooth like a well-played jazz tune.

You're taken aback for a moment. The bartender places two glasses of water on the bar in front of you, and you nod, almost hesitantly. The man sidles into the seat beside you, his fingers subtly brushing the tips of yours as he secures himself comfortably on the barstool, and it sends a jolt through your body, a sensation that lingers longer than it should. You catch a whiff of his cologne, both intoxicating and familiar, as it intertwines with the lingering scents of tobacco and whiskey.

"Thank you," he says, eyes never leaving yours as he lifts the glass of water to his lips. "The water is for you, by the way."

You chuckle shyly as you tap your fingers against the cold glass of water, feeling a flush rise to your cheeks. "Water? In a place like this?"

He smirks at this, a sight both amusing and enticing. "Well, we don't want to do anything regrettable, right?"

His words seem to crawl under your skin, and it's enough to convince you. You take a sip of the water, the cool liquid a stark comparison to the warmth spreading through all the corners of your body, and you suddenly feel more awake than ever. He also takes another sip of his own water, his eyes following your every move as you nearly down the entire glass. The way he looks at you𑁋with that dark, piercing stare that heavily clashes with the soft features of his handsome face𑁋makes your heart pound in your chest.

Around you, the bar has seemingly grown quiet, the only sound the soft music playing in the background. You can feel the heat of his gaze on your skin, and it's taking everything in you not to choke.

He breaks the silence with a charming smile, eyes now softened. "I'm assuming you don't come here often, do you?"

You meet his gaze with a coy smile, the corners of your mouth lifting. "You're quite the detective, aren't you?" There's a satisfied look to his face, and you clasp your hands together. "but to answer your question𑁋no, not exactly. How about you?"

"Ah, I had just moved here recently, actually," he reveals, which still doesn't seem to help the fact that you swear you've seen him before. It still draws you in, of course, and you can't help but wonder more about the mystery surrounding him𑁋both the one in his eyes and the one lingering in the air. The dim light of the bar casts a subtle glow on his features, and you find yourself captivated by the play of shadows and highlights dancing on his face.

"Welcome to the city then," You say it like a grand gesture. "It could be quite daunting at times, but you'll get used to it."

His gaze doesn't waver, and there's a quiet intensity in the way he studies you. "Perhaps I could get used to it faster if I had the right company."

Your heart skips a beat at his words, and you're suddenly acutely aware of the proximity between you two. The bar, the jazz music, the muted conversations around you𑁋all fade into the background as if the world has momentarily narrowed down to the space between your barstools.

"Smooth," You reply, a half-smile playing on your lips. "Is that your usual approach?"

He chuckles. "Only in certain situations."

A sly grin forms on your face. "And is this one of those situations?"

He tilts his head slightly as if in thought. "If you want it to be, of course."

All you could do is let out a soft laugh𑁋a laugh that blends with the faint jazz music playing in the background, a laughter that indeed signals the beginning of an unpredictable night.

"To new beginnings?" You raise your nearly-empty glass of water up to him.

He raises his glass in response, and the crystal-clear water catches the ambient lighting above, creating a small, sparkling spectacle on the surface of the bar counter.

"To new beginnings," he echoes.

The next minutes fly by in a breeze. Usually, letting people into your little bubble only causes for you to raise your guard up a bit more. You certainly didn't expect an utter stranger to intrigue you this much, just like a moth to a flame, especially in a place you never frequented to attend. You don't even mind the way his hand somehow found its rightful place on top of yours as you simply talked, or the way a glass of water can make you feel more alive than the strongest drink in the entire bar. And instinctively, your eyes would focus on the way his lips move he as he spoke, just barely catching all the words leaving his mouth.

When the music shifts to a more intimate tone, he looks into your eyes, a subtle invitation lingering in the air.

"Care to share a dance?" he asks, and the simple invitation is enough to course that warmth of anticipation through you once more.

The decision lingers in the air and his hand is extended towards you, a heartbeat away from being made.

And without a word, you slide off the barstool, your hand finding its place in his. He locks his grip on yours, and drags you in the direction of the small dance floor, the pungent smells of cigarette smoke and aged whiskey lingering as you weave through the crowd together.

When he suddenly pulls you closer to him, the scent of his cologne envelops you. His hand rests securely on the small of your back, guiding you with a subtle yet confident touch, the warmth of his fingers seeping through the fabric of your outfit. It sends a thrill through your body that heightens every single one of your senses.

As the music reaches its spirited crescendo, he spins you gently, the movement endearingly awkward, but you both don't care. When he brings you back into his arms, you're suddenly close to him way more than before, enough for his lips to be so close to yours that you can feel his warm breath against your skin.

The song slowly approaches its end, but he doesn't let you go. Yet just as the distance between your lips disappears, he stops. A teasing grin plays on his face, and he pulls away slightly, though your gaze doesn't intend to move away from his mouth.

"You're one of those," You remark airily.

He spins you around again, letting his fingers dance on the skin of your back. "Guilty as charged."

As the song draws to a close, he dips you in a move that feels straight out of a film. Your heart races, and when he pulls you back up, his lips are dangerously close to yours again. But this time, he doesn't hold back, and the kiss is a slow burn, gentle yet intensely passionate. One of his hands come to delicately cup your face, and the other brings you flush against him.

When the kiss breaks, he smiles, a genuine and warm expression that makes your heart flutter.

"Tell me your name," he whispers, breath caressing your cheek.

You meet his gaze, a playful glint in your eyes. "Maybe we’re more similar than you believe."

This only makes him lean in once again.

"Let's keep it that way, then," he suggests, grinning against your ear as if sharing a secret meant for only you. "Care to get out of here?"

It doesn't anything more than that for you to agree with a smile. Without uttering a word, you nod, your hand still entwined with his as you allow him to guide you through the dissipating crowd towards the exit of the bar. He ushers you outside, and the cool droplets that linger on the city's surfaces glisten under the streetlights.

The lively jazz bars highlight at the heart of the city within the late hours of the night, and his place isn't much farther than you anticipated thankfully.

It all happens so fleetingly𑁋one moment you're outside the door to his place, and another you're within the comfort of his bedroom, kissing him so feverishly with your fumbling hands on the buttons of his suit until you both fall on the bed, that the world outside seems to vanish. And when his hand makes contact with your skin for the first time, you could only gasp.

This is a night you will remember, and you'll make sure of it.

You dress yourself back in your clothes in the hushed morning. A comfortable silence lingers in the room, punctuated only by the distant sounds of the waking city. The rain outside has completed ceased away, bathing the bedroom in a soft glow of dawn.

The events of the night replay in your mind like a reel of a film𑁋the moment your eyes first met, the touches of his hands against yours, the kiss you shared on the dance floor, and the whispers of sweet nothings to your ear right underneath the sheets you sat atop.

"Leaving so soon?" he asks from behind, the huskiness of his voice making you pause.

You can sense the unspoken words hanging in the air𑁋the silent acknowledgment that this is a chapter that closes as the sun rises.

"Unfortunately, I must," You reply with a wistful smile, reaching for your shoes. "Real life calls."

He sits up on his bed, the sheets pooling around his waist, and you can't help but admire the way the morning light dances on the bareness of his body, his disheveled hair, and the remnants of the night before etched into his beautiful skin. There's a subtle tension that crackles in the air, and he clears his throat.

"Will I… see you again?"

You turn to face him, the playfulness in your eyes replaced by a hint of contemplation. The smile still doesn’t fade away from your lips.

"Who knows? Life is full of surprises, after all."

He watches you for some time as you fully dress yourself, a gaze struggling between the line of intimacy and distance, letting his eyes soak in your figure.

"Do you regret it at all?"

A pause, like a second and an eternity rolled into one. The room holds a quiet acknowledgment, a shared understanding that some moments are meant to be lived fully, without dwelling on what comes after, while others are meant to come and go like a shooting star. You aren’t entirely sure which this falls under.

"No," You answer simply, before setting your feet on the floor and standing up. "Not at all."

Another round of silence follows as you gather the rest of your belongings, trying to ignore the bittersweet ache in your chest threatening to cut you open. You feel his gaze lingering on you as you move about the room, still feeling those embers of the night before dancing upon your skin, as if they're fighting their way to linger a little longer, to save every last trace of the moments you shared.

"Joshua," he states as if in response to the unspoken question hanging in the air. "Joshua Hong."

His name escapes his lips like a secret, and you savour the sound of it, committing it to memory, committing him to memory. You ponder the thought of what it would be like to have your name said at the tip of his tongue in some other distant, intimate moment.

"Y/N," You whisper your name in return, the final piece of the exchange. "Y/N L/N."

taglist (open) ʚɞ @enhazen @haowrld @icyminghao @slytherinshua @jeonride @lockburn-castle @vrnism @weird-bookworm @mhlsymlysn @ryuwonieebae @yeonjuns-redhair @wonwooz1 @woohaeyo @mark-geolli

[roxxie-wolf]

𝒜 𝒮𝓉𝒶𝓇

Pairing: Lucifer x Fem!Reader

Summary: Helping Angel from getting a beating to entering a hotel and meeting someone who you will become close with.

Word count: 1.1k

Warnings: A few profanities.

Note: I hope y’all like it.^^

𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓅𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝟧

Upon waking, you remained in bed gazing at the ceiling, a heavy sigh escaping your lips as memories of the previous day flooded your mind. Thanks to the unexpected knocks at the door, you were spared from whatever could have happened to you. Feeling drained and exhausted, you debated whether to get up or spend the day in bed.

The thought of Lucifer, with his charming quirks and ever-changing moods, occupied your thoughts. His dramatic flair and playful silliness were endearing, and you found comfort in the way he could seamlessly transition from theatrics to vulnerability. It was as if he wore his emotions like a costume, revealing different facets of himself with each passing moment.

But then there was Val—the unspoken shadow that lingered. You hadn’t confided in Lucifer about what happened with Val, even though your conversations had grown more frequent. Perhaps it was fear or hesitation that held you back. The hotel had become a sanctuary for you, a place where you felt safe and loved. The idea of making it your permanent home was something you were seriously considering.

You decided to rise from your bed and go brush your teeth. After getting dressed, you approached the door and found Lucifer on the other side, his hand poised to knock. He had a mischievous glint in his eyes. His greeting was as theatrical as ever, and you couldn’t help but smile.

“Hi there, good morning!” His voice danced through the air, and he lowered his raised hand to rest on his cane. “I was wondering when you were coming out.” His smile was contagious, and you felt a warmth settle in your chest.

“Hey,” rubbing the sleep from your eyes. “I was torn between staying in bed and facing the day.” The events of yesterday still weighed on you, but Lucifer’s presence offered a welcome distraction.

“How’s everyone?” you asked, curious about the others. *Were they still gathered around the breakfast table?*

“They’re all downstairs,” Lucifer extended his arm toward you. “Come on, let’s head down together.” His offer was both gallant and inviting, and you hesitated only for a moment before linking your arm with his.

The kitchen buzzed with activity as you and Lucifer descended the stairs. All eyes turned toward you, their gazes curious and knowing. You released Lucifer’s arm, a subtle gesture that spoke volumes—a choice between companionship and uncertainty.

The room seemed to hold its breath, waiting for your next move. Angel’s grin widened, mischief dancing in his eyes. He’d been waiting for you, and his excitement was palpable.

“Hey, toots!” Angel’s voice cut through the air, brimming with excitement. His plate was still half-full, and he gestured for you to take a seat. “I was waiting for ya.” His grin was infectious, and you couldn’t help but feel a sense of belonging.

Lucifer, however, wore a different expression. His playfulness had given way to something more serious—a shadow that clung to his features. “Well,” he said, his voice low and measured, “I’ll let you have your breakfast. Enjoy.” With a wink, he turned and left, leaving you with a flutter of uncertainty.

You took a seat at the table, the chair’s familiar creak a reminder of the day’s predictability. The plate in front of you was a colorful array of breakfast delights, but the food seemed tasteless compared to the richness of your inner turmoil.

“Good Morning, Y/N!” Charlie’s voice, bright as the morning sun, cut through the haze of your thoughts. Her smile was infectious, a beacon of warmth in the coolness of the kitchen.

“We were just about to head out of the kitchen, except for Angel, of course,” she added, her eyes twinkling with a hint of mischief.

“Well, hope you enjoy your breakfast,” Charlie said, her cheerfulness wrapping around you like a comforting shawl. She waved and headed out with Vaggie, their departure a whirlwind of motion and soft laughter. One by one, everyone else followed, leaving you in the quiet company of Angel and the subtle scent of morning coffee.

Angel leaned in, his eyes twinkling. “I see he went to get ya,” his tone conspiratorial. “You still think he doesn’t like ya in a way, toots?” His words caught you off guard, and you fumbled for a response.

“I mean,” you stammered, your cheeks flushing, “just because he seeks me out doesn’t necessarily mean he likes me.” But deep down, you wondered. Perhaps Lucifer’s theatricality masked something more profound.

Angel’s mischievous grin widened as he leaned in, his voice a conspiratorial whisper. “Well, toots, if you ask me, I think he likes you.” His words hung in the air, and you couldn’t help but feel a flutter of hope.

“Well, I guess, but still Angel,” You toyed with your food, torn between Angel’s playful assertion and your own reservations. Angel’s next words caught you off guard. “If you let him he’ll fuck you.” The shock of it made you gasp, and you playfully swatted his shoulder. “Angel,” you protested, cheeks flushing, “How can you say that? You know I can’t fuck Charlie’s dad for fucks sake.”

Angel’s laughter echoed through the kitchen, a sound that seemed to mock the gravity of your thoughts. “Who said you can’t,” he said between bites of his toast, “I mean, we’re in hell, toots.” His casual dismissal of the norms made you roll your eyes in playful exasperation.

“I did, Angel,” you retorted, taking a sip of your juice. It was a small act of defiance against the chaos that surrounded you.

“Well, that’s you who is putting that in the way then, toots. No one else is,” Angel replied, leaning back with the confidence of someone who had never let convention dictate his desires.

His words gave you pause. The idea of being with Lucifer wasn’t unappealing, but it came with a role you hadn’t considered—becoming Charlie’s stepmother. The thought was daunting, yet not without its charms. *How would it be to step into such a role? To be a part of their family?*

As you finished your breakfast and made your way across the lobby, your mind was focused on the day ahead with Angel. You had plans to explore the city, enjoy the sights, and revel in each other's company. Little did you know, Lucifer was watching your every move, his determination to break the contract with Valentino was palpable, a silent battle waged behind those enigmatic eyes.

Lucifer’s mind churned with possibilities. He’d explored every avenue, dissected every clause, seeking a loophole that would free you from the binding pact. Uncertainty gnawed at him, but he had a plan. *Would his plan succeed, or would it unravel like smoke in the infernal winds?*

⭐️𝒫𝓇𝑒𝓋𝒾𝑜𝓊𝓈⭐️ ⭐️𝒩𝑒𝓍𝓉⭐️

Let me know if you want to be added to the tag list so you be updated every time.^^ I do try to proofread but if I missed something please let me know.

Also I sometimes tend to make minor changes to the chapters.

Thank you! For reading I hope you enjoyed it.⭐️

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[theromanticscrooge]

Introducing Your Friendly Neighborhood Langanaphyllis simnovorii (Sims 2 Cowplant)

Venus flytraps have a 'sophisticated' snap trap system. Hair triggers, otherwise known as cilia, along the inside of the trap must be set off at least 5 times for successful trap activation. If a bug gets caught in the trap, there's a 30-second window of potential escape. If they only triggered two hairs, or they're small and fast, they're likely to be let go.

The more a bug struggles, the more hairs they brush against, and then they're locked in. This part of the trap is a failsafe. Despite their namesake, insects are more of a supplement to a flytrap's diet than a staple. Any insect they capture takes anywhere from days to weeks to fully digest. Flytraps glean the majority of their nutrients through sunlight and photosynthesis. The carnivorous diet they're famous for is a response to what nutrients they can't derive from stereotypical plant processes due to their very dry, sparse environment; beetles, ants, and spiders are their source of nitrogen and phosphorous specifically. Again, the name is deceptive. Flies are a very small, almost insignificant part of their diet!

While the reality of the plant pales in comparison to its sensationalist reputation, the flytrap and its carnivorous cousins capture someone's imagination regardless. Most plants are considered harmless and innocent; a beautiful, aesthetically pleasing part of the background. They're a highlight in poems and pretty things writers romantically draw comparisons to in hopes to impress their love interest or describe someone's beauty. They're at the bottom of the food chain. They're a readily available source of food or garnishes to meat-based dishes. Plants like the flytrap challenge the otherwise neat and tidy vision of the hierarchical food chain. A flytrap temporarily climbs up a step of this chain the second it successfully captures and digests an insect.

The idea that flytraps are such a weird exception to what plants 'should be' are part of what have inspired a long spate of stories featuring a carnivorous plant. Arguably, the most well-known flytrap in media is Audrey II from the theatrically released 1986 musical Little Shop of Horrors. The meticulously choreographed and beautifully built Audrey animatronics are the definitive imagery for who Audrey is and what he looks like. While no one can quite recreate that level of detail, even local stage plays try to feature as dynamic and beautiful an Audrey puppet as they can recreate on a small, humble budget. My introduction to Audrey II was a high school stage play. That team managed to build and operate an Audrey II that lives rent free in my mind and sparked my own fascination with sci-fi B movie horror plants to the point they're an active staple in my own art and projects.

One of my personal favorite Audrey-inspired horror plants is the cowplant from the Sims series. Or more specifically, the cowplant's introduction in The Sims 2. Without cheats, a Sim has to reach at least level 6 in the Natural Scientist career to unlock the cowplant as a career reward. The playful flavor text for the Laganaphyllis simnovorii reads:

This bizarre bovine vegetation is large enough to swallow your next-door neighbor whole. In fact, it WILL eat your neighbors. Your friends will be hard-pressed to resist the tantalizing vine-cake of the carnivorous Laganaphyllis Simnovorii. After it has consumed some prey, milk it for sweet, rejuvenating nectar of life. A swig of this liquid refreshment will add precious days to a Sim's life and wash away any regret they may have over their visitor's fate.

The cowplant sits adjacent to some of the goofier, more cartoonish elements of the Sims universe at large. While it isn't an explicitly playable option, superheroes and villains exist in-universe. For example, one of the seedier business deals a mayor can take in SimCity 2000 is striking a deal with a supervillain to let them build their evil lair somewhere in town for a hefty sum. In Sims 2, the top of the Law Enforcement career is 'Captain Hero.' Captain Hero flies to work and wears a skin-tight latex suit. The top of the Criminal career is Captain Hero's supervillain counterpart with the accompanying ridiculous outfit. There's also Mad Scientists with the appropriate labcoat and cybernetic hand. Mad Scientists are the classic cartoon supervillain variant with a very ambiguous tag on what kind of science they specialize in as well as an aptitude for inventing who-knows-what contraptions.

In contrast to a Mad Scientist, the Natural Science career features a specific kind of mad scientist: this Sim is interested in studying organic life and creating a large myriad of biological abominations. If there wasn't in-game hints about cow plants as a naturally occurring species that's existed for centuries, they were absolutely cross-bred and cultivated by a nutjob in this career track. When a Sim reaches the top of the Natural Science career as Ecological Guru, they cover their bits with Garden of Eden leaves and fly off for a day of dubious Captain Planet adventures. Perhaps, cowplants are restricted as a 'you worked hard' incentive for a natural scientist because they either grew it themselves or they can supposedly handle the responsibility and consequences involved with keeping one better than the general public. That said, later Sims games dropped the career climbing requirement and any average Sim can now buy one wholesale or grow one themselves. Regardless of the game mechanics, these plants exist and are readily available in some capacity.

The cowplant itself is a cow head with sharp teeth and a conspicuous pink udder dangling from its chin surrounded by a crown of leaves. The head is supported by a thin, thorny, vine-like stem that tapers down into a hilariously mundane terracotta flower pot. The base of the plant is surrounded by leaves that look similar to the trap rosettes on a Venus flytrap. A tail patterned like the cow head with a leaf on the end in place of thin hairs pokes out of the back of the pot. In a nutshell, the cowplant is a step further than just a rehash or direct satire of Audrey II. Before the cowplant, the original Sims features an ominous Venus flytrap adjacent plant. Its a decorative item with fun flavor text that Sims need to water every so often. There's also the mutant plant from The Sims Bustin' Out. According to the Wiki, a mutant plant will feed on and kill Sims if it isn't properly tended to.

In regards to the cowplant, they can be appeased with a 35 simoleon leg of lamb. They need to be fed once every 12 in-game hours to avoid deploying their vine-cake tongue. That said, a cowplant will keep its vine-cake out as long as it takes to be fed lamb or attract a Sim. When a Sim does go after the cake slice, the cowplant teases them a bit before dive-bombing the Sim, snapping the full length of its bovine head and jaws around them, and then swallowing them whole. The 'swallow' mechanics operate by cartoon logic: Somehow, the Sim liquefies, breaks down, or whatever else to fit through the ridiculously thin vine body. Within minutes, the plant has not only fully digested its victim but turned them into a life-extending milk. When another Sim milks the plant and drinks, their life is extended by 5 days followed by a disturbing memory hinting that this Sim not only enjoyed their beverage but is ready to find their next victim.

Not only is the cowplant partly inspired by Audrey II, it brings some of the moral and ethical dilemmas Seymour encountered after 'feeding the plant.' Where Audrey II was a botanist's straight-shot to fame and wealth because of his weird, exotic appearance, the cowplant is a means of attaining eternal youth and exterminating enemies with an immediate, satisfying, and horrible vengeance. Seymour had to strike deals with Audrey II and was placed at his mercy and discretion. While Seymour isn't innocent, he's contrasted against harsh circumstances and a nasty allegory about how all-consuming capitalism can be. He's a very direct horror story about what someone loses if they devote themselves and sacrifice everything to the illusion of 'the American dream.' The cowplant can be placed in a variety of storytelling roles and the resulting themes or symbolism depend on the Sims or story positioned around them.

In-game text describes the cake as 'tantalizing.' Part of this relies on Sims operating on the same kind of cartoon logic that helps conmen like Stan Pines fleece tourists with charisma and hot-glue-covered taxidermy. If Sims know that cowplants exist, there has to be some level of caution and skepticism around interacting with one. In the case of Audrey II, only Seymour is aware of Audrey's ability to speak and his man-eating tendencies for the majority of the story. He's successful because of the myth and mystery surrounding him. Its possible that cowplants are considered a myth too. Unless a Sim works in natural science, they may be more mystified and enchanted by a cowplant than scared.

Also, despite details like the sharp teeth, cowplants are cute and endearing in an unconventional way. Many players keep a plant around for the casual tail wag and the eager and almost puppy-like excitement cowplants portray at getting a treat. They're aware the plant is dangerous. Its similar to how some people react to bears, lions, or other predatory creatures in real life. In some light, they look so cute and play on the part of the brain that lights up around dogs, cats, or other critters. If there's some possibility, albeit slim, that this creature can be domesticated long enough to pet, it's worth the risk to some people. This element may be at play as much as the 'forbidden cake' element is.

The cowplant is a creature following instincts and trying to care for itself. Its not a deliberately evil and diabolical being from outer space like Audrey II. Whatever 'evil' and unethical strings are attached to the cowplant are more a byproduct of its potential owner and their ministrations.

Another interesting note about in-game mechanics is that Sims can roll the specific want to 'drink' another Sim. A player can project 'evil' intent through storytelling but this want adds a unique, fucked up level to gameplay. This Sim hates someone else so intensely that they want to contrive a situation where this specific someone gets eaten. Just as a framing device for this, one of the families featured in the soap operatic neighborhood Pleasantview are Daniel, Mary-Sue, and their twin daughters Angela and Lilith. Daniel and Mary Sue have a tepid, fracturing marriage; Daniel is cheating on his wife with the maid and Mary Sue is a workaholic that prioritizes her job over everything and everyone else. Angela is the golden child; she has straight As, she's the 'it' girl, and her parents lavish her with praise, gifts, attention, etc. Lilith is the black sheep and scapegoat. She and her sister were compared enough that they hate each other. Angela instigates fights with Lilith to blow off steam. Its acceptable for her to pick on and belittle her twin because her parents set that precedent.

Given this context, there's a chance Lilith will roll the drink Sim want for Angela. Depending on the player, they may lean towards separating the sisters to the degree they go no contact later in life or even try to have them talk things out and start making amends. If Lilith rolls this want, it cements just how deep and intense her hatred is. Its up for some interpretation, depending on how a player interprets Sim wants in general, but the implications are definitely there. Its one thing to set the cowplant as a tool in a Saturday morning cartoon villain's chase for eternal youth. There's dramatic and heartbreaking depths when a depressed and frustrated teen like Lilith seriously considers using a cowplant as a means to assuage her crappy home situation. The want description highlights the life-extending benefits of cowplant milk, but the stronger emphasis is absolutely what triggered the want. Its more about the cowplant as a nasty, specific revenge tool than the milk.

If a Sim wants eternal youth, they have two other, far more friendly options: Mortimer Goth's life-extending elixir or becoming a vampire. If a Sim has enough aspiration points and either high gold or white aspiration level, they can extend their life by 3 Sim days after drinking some. There's at least 3 portions in the convenient water cooler and there's no limit on how many a Sim can attain if their aspiration stays high. The caveat is that a Sim needs high aspiration for the most effective results. As for becoming a vampire, a Sim needs to befriend a grand vampire and be bitten. Once a Sim becomes a vampire, they live forever as long as they stay out of the sun. The other benefits are static needs while they sleep during the day and faster skill-building at night. Again, a deliberate want for the cowplant has sinister undertones because of the variety of choices a Sim has if they specifically want eternal life.

There's a layer of irony to the cowplant too. There are so many papers and explorations of The Sims as commentary on capitalism. The original game blatantly matched 50's shopping music and Americana sitcom elements with gameplay that forced an ever-increasing need for higher-value items and bigger, better, more for a happier Sim. Little Shop of Horrors sets an evil alien Venus flytrap as an allegory about the destructive, life-ruining force behind capitalism. Plugging an Audrey II adjacent entity next to a Sim presents the player with the make-their-own-Seymour-Krelbourne variant of a choose-your-own-adventure book. Will they adhere to the advice of 'don't feed the plants' or will the cowplant present a safe exploration of how much further this story can go when its a sandbox instead of a stage?

[vodika-vibes]

Ok so what about Jesse x a Zeltron!reader who works on the 501st base where they maybe have a casual kind of relationship, which is typical for the Zeltron species (basically a bunch of attractive high-energy and high-libido pink people who don't like commitment), and then Reader realizes they're actually developing *feelings.* For this *one* guy (perish the thought).

So, Reader decides they need to quit this before they're in too deep with their emotions, but it turns out Jesse feels the same?

Zeltrons are my favorite Star Wars species and I wish someone would do something with them in canon but oh well at least there's fic and hcs.

I Won't Say I'm In Love

Summary: This thing between you and Jesse is fun. It’s fun, it’s comfortable, and you’re content with how it’s going. He can easily keep up with you in all things. It’s not a relationship. Relationships require commitment and you’re not about that life. And then, one day, you realize that maybe you are.

Pairing: ARC Trooper Jesse x Zeltron F! Reader

Word Count: 1973

Warnings: 18+, no smut but still an adult fic

A/N: I'm not sure this is exactly what you wanted, but I hope you like it anyway.

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“What are you thinking about, beautiful?” Jesse asks as he plays with a strand of your hair. It had been curled, when the night started, but has since lost its curl due to rain and other activities.

You glance at him from where your head is resting on his bare chest, and then you release a theatrical groan and stretch across your bed. “Food, mostly.”

His dark eyes sweep down your bare body, and then focus back on your face, a wide grin crossing his features, “I suppose we did skip dinner.” He muses thoughtfully.

“And who’s fault is that?”

He arches a single brow, “Yours. I came here to pick you up so we can meet our friends at the club, and you jumped me.”

You sit up and hold out a single finger, intent on correcting him, and then you frown and bring your finger to your chin, “...I did do that, didn’t I?”

“It’s okay,” Jesse says as he sits up as well, a slightly smug smirk crossing his face, “I’m gorgeous, it’s understandable.”

An amused huff falls from your lips, and you push him. It doesn’t have any effect, Jesse is both bigger and stronger than you, but the intention gets across well enough.

“I’m stealing your shirt and ordering food,” You announce as you swing your legs off your bed and start searching for the top of his blacks that he was wearing when he arrived. 

It’s gotta be here somewhere, right? Maybe you took it off him in the living room?

You bend over to shift a pile of clothes to see if it ended up under that somehow, and Jesse releases an appreciative whistle. A laugh falls from you as you straighten and shoot him a look, “Really?”

“Fuck, you’re so hot.” His heated gaze drags down your body, and he shifts on the bed, leaning back against the headboard and kicking the sheet down slightly.

He’s already half-hard again.

Honestly, he’s such a man sometimes.

“Come here, babe. Let me show you.” He holds his hand out to you, and it’s tempting. It’s so tempting. He’s very good at sex, after all.

But then, just as you’re about to join him in bed, your stomach rumbles loudly. Jesse’s head falls back against the headboard as he bursts out laughing. He has a booming laugh, and his entire body shakes with his amusement.

And you find yourself staring at him as he laughs. 

You should be offended, right? He’s laughing at you.

Only—

Only, he looks so—

A tiny smile lifts your lips, and you can’t help but think I’d like to make him laugh like that forever.

“Ohh, what’s that look for?” Jesse is still grinning at you, but he’s no longer on the bed. In fact, he’s tugging his lounge pants on, and holding the top of his blacks in one of his hands.

“Look?” You catch the shirt as he tosses it at you, “What look?”

“You have a look.” He walks over to you and lightly catches your chin between two fingers, “It’s a cute look.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Sure, sure.” Jesse leans in and kisses the tip of your nose, “Put some clothes on, gorgeous. We need to feed the demon in your stomach.”

You huff and tug the shirt over your head, “I want pizza,”

Jesse makes a face, “Are you sure you wouldn’t just rather order a tub of lard to eat?”

“Ew.” You follow him out of the bedroom and into the living room, “Pizza is more than lard.”

“It’s just as bad for you.” Jesse points out as he grabs your datapad and turns toward you.

“All of the best things in life are,” You counter as you duck under his arm to peer at the screen too.

“Name one,”

“Alcohol.”

“Babe, you don’t even like drinking.”

“I like it! Just not when I can taste it.”

“My point exactly,” Jesse scrolls through one of the food delivery apps, “Oh, how about this place?”

You glance at the restaurant, and tilt your head, “Curry?”

“You like their bread,” He offers temptingly.

“I do like their bread.” You muse thoughtfully, “Alright, order that. As much as you like.”

“You sure?”

“I make plenty of money. I can afford to splurge on a meal for us, Jesse. Don’t worry about it.”

He presses a kiss against your temple, “You’re the best.”

“Yes, I know~” You duck back under his arm to head into the kitchen to start some caf. Do you need it? No, not really. But you want it. “Do you want caf, Jesse?”

“Always,” He calls back to you, “Hey, d’ya mind if I order a dessert?”

“Buy whatever you want, Jesse. I don’t mind.”

You start the machine and then turn to lean against the counter, your gaze lingering on Jesse as he scrolls through the menu across the room. He’s not paying attention to you right now, which means you can take the time to actually admire him.

Jesse’s…handsome.

Handsome and charming. He’s not the funniest, his puns tend to make you groan, cover your eyes, and beg him to stop. He’s easy to talk to, you don’t think he has a judgemental bone in his body. He’s covered in tattoos, the republic cog on his face is his most obvious tattoo, but it’s not his only tattoo.

He’s affectionate. When the both of you are out together, his arm is either around your waist, or around your shoulder, or he’s playing with your hair or your fingers—

The realization comes to you slowly, like a sun rising over the horizon.

You love him.

The idea is laughable, really. 

You’re a Zeltron. Your people don’t do commitment as a rule.

Having a monogamous fuck-buddy is one thing. But a life-partner?

You gaze at Jesse for a moment longer. You should end this.

He’s a good man, Jesse. He deserves better than someone like you. You would be the first one to admit that you’re shallow and petty. If you were a puddle, Jesse could stand in you without even getting the soles of his boots wet.

You’re a terrible person. Quick to dismiss other people’s feelings (ugh) as unimportant. Even quicker to dismiss people who question the decisions you’ve made.

He deserves better than you.

Then Jesse turns to you and flashes a bright grin, and you realize that you can’t let him go. 

Turns out you’re actually a terrible person.

You wonder what you must look like to him right now. Standing here in the kitchen, your hair a mess, wearing his shirt and nothing else.

You wonder what he thinks of you in general. Your relationship was meant to be purely physical with the added bonus of being actual friends. Does he think you’re just some…some slut? He wouldn’t be the first person who categorized you like that and wouldn’t be the last.

But the idea of him thinking of you like that makes your chest ache.

Jesse’s in front of you before you realize it, his smile has vanished replaced with a look of concern as he stands over you. “Babe? Everything alright?” He asks, as he lightly cradles your face in his hands.

No. Nothing is ever going to be alright ever again. Why did I have to catch feelings?

“Do you think I’m a slut?” You ask instead.

Jesse blinks at you, twice. Seemingly astounded by your question. And then you watch, surprised, as something dangerous slides across his face, “Did someone call you that?”

“Yeah, almost daily.” The insult doesn’t bother you, not anymore. But you want to know what he thinks about you.

His expression becomes even more forbidding, “Names. Please. And locations. I just wanna talk to them.”

You blink at him, and then a startled laugh falls from you, “Jesse, babe. I’m a Zeltron, I’ve not been offended by being called a slut since I was a teenager.” You press your hands over his, “I want to know if you personally think I’m a slut.”

He looks pained for a moment, “People have been calling you that since you were a teenager?”

“Jesse.”

“Of course I don’t think you’re a slut. I’ve never thought that.” He tilts your head back slightly, “I think—”

He trails off, and your hands move to his wrists, “You think?”

“You’re amazing.”

“Of course I am.”

He scans your face for a moment, “Where did all of this come from? You’ve never worried about this before.”

You open your mouth to say something and then hesitate.

“Babe? Come on, you can tell me.”

“I just realized that I’m a horrible person, that’s all.”

“You’re not, though!” Jesse’s hands fall to your shoulders, “Listen to me. You have to know that there are a lot of people on Coruscant who don’t even see us as people. And you…you never questioned it. Do you have any idea how amazing that is?”

“That’s, quite literally, the bar on the ground, Jesse.”

He shakes his head, “You’d be amazed at how many people are willing to start digging. You know, I’m not even convinced that General Skywalker sees us as people.”

That’s…a terrifying thought. Your hands tighten around his wrists, and Jesse smiles at you soothingly before he leans in and kisses you gently.

“I have a confession to make, beautiful.”

You tilt your head to the side, “A confession?”

He nods, one of his hands moving to cradle your neck, “I’m afraid I’m in love with you.”

Whatever you were expecting him to say, it wasn’t that.

“And I know that we agreed to keep this,” He gestures to the pair of you, “wholly physical and platonic, but…fuck, beautiful, I can’t do it.”

You open your mouth to say something, but Jesse presses a finger over your lips, there’s something like anxiety on his face.

“You don’t have to say anything. I know that you don’t do complicated and that relationships were never on the table for you,” He says quickly, “I also know that I’m not your only guy, so—”

Wait. What?

“Says who?” You blurt.

“What?”

“What what? Who says that I’m sleeping with other people? Because I’m not.”

Jesse stares at you, “But, when I’m deployed—”

“Sex toys exist for a reason, Jesse.” You counter defensively, “And…well…the only people who might compare to you are your brothers and that just made me feel icky.”

Jesse has an odd look on his face.

“What?”

“I love you.”

“You said that already.”

His lips crash against yours, surprising you. And, while you and Jesse have shared a lot of kisses, none of them have been quite like this before. He’s kissing you like he’s trying to possess you.

Jesse lifts you like you weigh nothing, and sets you on the counter before he slides between your legs, and he does this without breaking the kiss. “You love me,” He mumbles against your lips.

Your face burns with embarrassment, “I didn’t say that.”

“You didn’t have to.” He moves his lips to your neck and bites down, leaving an obvious mark on your pink skin, something he’s never done before. 

He moves his lips a little lower and bites down again, pulling a soft moan from you, “Jess—”

“Take this off,” He murmurs as he tugs on the shirt you're wearing, “I need you.”

“But, food.”

He flashes a sly grin, “We can take a break when it gets here.”

“You’re such a man sometimes,” You complain, but even so, you’re still pulling the shirt off.

“You’ve never complained before.” He kisses you again, his tongue flicking against your lower lip, “Fuck, I love you.”

This time, when he says it, you just giggle and lean into him. Maybe commitment won’t be so bad when Jesse is your other half.

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[astoundingbeyondbelief]

Kaiju Week in Review (November 26-December 2, 2023)

I wasn't over the moon when Toho announced that Takashi Yamazaki's Blockbuster Monster Movie was in fact the next Godzilla film. I had seen a few of his works—none bad, but none spectacular either. Well, I've set my sights on watching the rest in the new year, because Godzilla Minus One is an unqualified masterpiece. A tagline from the original Godzilla, King of the Monsters! comes to mind (as it often does when you're me): "Mightiest melodrama of them all!" A lot of the post-Showa films suffer from an abundance of characters who just spout exposition and look at monitors; here, almost everyone in the small cast gets at least one close encounter with Godzilla, and the monster's backstory is conveyed with extreme efficiency. This tale of a war veteran trying to rebuild his life in the ruins of Tokyo, stumbling into a family, finding fulfillment in blowing up leftover mines, and haunted by what he perceives as his cowardice in combat, would have been plenty compelling without Godzilla.

Since it does have Godzilla, it's high on my list of the best movies of the year, and I only need one viewing to call it one of the best installments in the almost-70-year-old series. Yamazaki patiently waited some 15 years after Always: Sunset on Third Street 2 for his shot at a Godzilla feature. You certainly get the sense, watching one of the most brutal, pissed-off incarnations of the monster ever to grace the screen, that he spent every day of it in preparation. Watch it often while it's still in theaters, and watch it big.

Godzilla Minus One will gross about $10 million in its U.S. opening "weekend", a third-place finish that beat expectations. For context, Godzilla 2000, the last Toho Godzilla film to receive a wide release here, made about $10 million during its entire theatrical run here. Ticket prices were cheaper then, of course, and Minus One was helped along further by almost half of attendees going to premium-format screenings. Conversely, it had to overcome Americans' subtitle phobia, and the first weekend of December is usually a slow one. I was pessimistic at the outset, but now I expect larger theaters to carry the film into the new year, especially with near-universal raves from critics and audiences.

Yes, a third section for Godzilla Minus One; it's well-deserved, I promise. MyKaiju is risking life and limb by hosting an English translation of the film's novelization, written by Takashi Yamazaki himself. It appears to be at least partially machine-translated, but the Japanese text is included for comparison. Haven't read it yet, as I want to see the film a second time first, but quite a breakthrough given how mysterious this sort of thing usually is.

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters could never hope to compare with the opening of a stellar new Godzilla film; unfortunately, I also thought this week's episode was the weakest so far. It's bookended by Frost-Vark action, but the rest just drags. All's forgiven if the teacher and the hacker smooch though.

Toho and Legendary used to let each other's live-action Godzilla movies breathe; now the U.S. opening weekend of one is coinciding with the opening marketing push of the other. IGN released a trio of pics from Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire, showing Kong with his axe; Dr. Andrews, Jia, and Trapper (Dan Stevens's character) in uniform; and Godzilla "evolving into a powerful new form." The same article included an interview with director Adam Wingard. Naturally, he didn't give away much... besides the return of Doug.

Earlier in the week, Legendary put out a trio of posters featuring Godzilla, Kong, and the film's antagonist, now christened Skar King. The taglines ("Unite" for our heroes, "Bow to Your King" for SK) sound like kaiju campaign slogans. Makes me wonder if, like Godzilla vs. Megalon before it, the movie will improbably capitalize on the presidential election next year. To steal a joke from Titanollante: Godzilla/Kong unity ticket? They'd have my vote.

Godzilla's new form, meanwhile, has already been spoiled by a T-shirt on Legendary's own site and some dire-looking Playmates figures. It makes sense that Wingard would want to have his own spin on the character after keeping the design from Godzilla: King of the Monsters for Godzilla vs. Kong. Hard to cast judgment without seeing the real design in full, but there's one particular detail I really like.

The film also has a booth at CCXP in Brazil, with a panel later today, so I think a trailer is incoming (the main reason I hammered out this whole post so quickly).

I missed this one last week: Tsuburaya announced an anime project called Ultraman: DARKNESS HEELS. The DARKNESS HEELS branding has been around for a while, spotlighting prominent evil Ultras—and, of course, Jugglus Juggler. No details on the anime yet, but if the Juggleman's there, so am I.

The big toy reveal this weekend was Super7's ULTIMATES! MaiGoji figure. Previous Godzilla figures from this line haven't lived up to the official photos, but hope springs eternal. It's $85 (much less than the MonsterArts); preorders started Friday. Other highlights: a Super7 ReAction figure of the original Godzilla's skeleton, which comes with a little Oxygen Destroyer, and a plush Mothra from Surreal Entertainment that can flip to imago form to a neck pillow-shaped larva.

[mammalsofaction]

16. Lazily (because I thought it said lizardly for a moment)

From the prompt list here

Perryshmirtz kissing....lazily

Bring Me A Dream

Rating: G

Relationship: Heinz Doofenshmirtz/Perry the Platypus

Add tags: Established relationship, domesticity, mute Perry, human Perry, Vanessa (mentioned), old men being gross and in love

A/N: Works best if you imagine Perry's just finished working an intense offshore mission and just chillaxing at Heinz's place.

---

"-Could've sworn I left it by the fireplace, no don't turn the lights on, sweetie, Perry's on the couch and he's had a long day."

"Oh, sure. Hey, Perry."

Perry grunts in acknowledgement.

"Now where is-is it this one, pumpkin?"

"Th-dad, no, mom bought me this new one last week, it's got orange decals and I snapped the holster off."

"What does an MP3 player need a holster for? Doesn't it play music?"

"It's not actually-I meant the little clip in the back I use to pin it to my belt when I'm out, I snapped it off at school last Tuesday which is why I can't pin in it on me-,"

"Which explains why you lost it, ok, I think I get the picture. Have you tried your room?"

"Yes, dad, that's the first place I checked. Are you sure we can't boot Norm up to let him scan this place?"

"I told you, pumpkin, he's been on that Minecraft server behind my back and skipping on enough of his charging time that he's getting cranky, so he's on time out. Also he's way too loud, he's going to wake Perry up. Have you checked the balcony by my lab? You like pacing there."

"I wasn't up there last week!"

Perry growls in warning, eyes kept shut. The voices shush themselves apologetically.

"I wasn't up there last week." Vanessa repeats herself, much more quietly.

"Well, you can try it anyway if we don't find it in here. Check my vinyl rack, I might have put it away and forgot about it."

As Vanessa patters further away, a more familiar presence looms over Perry's prone, half asleep figure. He does not acknowledge it, hoping it will go away.

Heinz sighs, both fond and exasperated in equal measure. "Alright, get up."

Perry doesn't move.

"This is going to go by a lot quicker if you co-operate. I need to search the cushions. "

Perry only shuts his eyes tighter, and moves his hat so that it fully covers his face, keeping out even the faint orange light of the fire.

Heinz sighs again, and soon enough Perry feels his tucking his hands between Perry's back and the cushions, trying to wedge his hands in the crannies despite the sluggish obstacle above them.

It tickles a little, and Perry wiggles.

Heinz huffs. "Oh for Gott's sake, will you-,"

Quick as flash, Perry wraps his arm around Heinz's unsuspecting figure and tugs him fully down. Heinz yelps, tucking his arms in as Perry twists them around, pinning the scientist down against the back of the sofa, but before he could start yelling, Perry began to pepper raspberries all across Heinz's scrunched up face. The scientist began to laugh.

"I found it! It was on the key plate next to the-oh gross. Dad...,"

Perry releases his captive hold on his lover, and Heinz stumbles to the floor, disheveled and winded with laughter. "Phew, sorry, Pumpkin, just got distracted."

"Perry, I thought you were supposed to be sleeping."

I am. The agent answers innocently, and to drive the message home he leans his head back into the cushion of the armrest and snores theatrically. Vanessa throws a pillow at him.

"Come on, sweetie, I'll spare your mother the trouble and drive you home. Perry'll hold down the fort."

Perry's shut his eyes again, properly settling back down, though he briefly crosses his heart.

"Ugh, you guys are so gross. I'm gonna wait in the car."

Perry hears her footsteps walking away, followed by a slamming door, before he allows his previously suppressed grin overtake his face. Heinz huffs again, clearly bemused.

"She used to think you were so cool."

Perry raises his eyebrows, then signs with some measure of offense. I am cool.

Heinz cackled. "Oh, sure. She doesn't think it anymore."

Perry hums, already falling back asleep. His signs are sluggish as he points out, You think I'm cool.

Heinz makes some sort of incredibly affectionate noise. "You are cool."

The edge of Perry's smile quirks up, a smug indication of see? As he feels Heinz leaning down however, it melts into besotted curl, reciprocating the sweet press of lips like a hot cup of cocoa on a cold December afternoon.

"Get some sleep." Heinz says, right against his lips. "I'll be right back."

Perry trusts that he will be. He's fast asleep even before Heinz locks the door behind him.

[attapullman]

Just imagining Neighbor!Bob dropping everything to take you to the airport when a last minute work trip comes up. He loves not having to hide the fact that you’re together, since you’re far enough away from the prying eyes of your nosy neighbors. He drives you right up to the curb of the terminal and takes all your bags out of the car for you, then gives you the little bag of snacks he put together for you—all your favorites. He gives you a long, lingering kiss and tells you he’ll see you as soon as you get home because he’s coming back to pick you up 🥹

Hope you have a safe trip!

- @bradshawsbaby 💕

Neighbor!Bob driving you to the airport is so on brand for him and now I’m sobbing 😭 the most helpful, thoughtful man

Ever since you mentioned leaving town for work the other day, he’s shifted his schedule to accommodate. Leaving base early, pulling up in front of your house and laughing when you dart out like you’re a spy, practically throwing your suitcase in the back and scrambling in the truck before he can even get out and help you. It’s the middle of the day, none of the neighbors are home, but you’re cute with your theatrics.

The entire drive he holds your hand, only letting go to change gears. It’s soothing listening to you go over your schedule the next few days, disappointed that you don’t get to explore the city more, but glad that means you’ll be home sooner.

Once he pulls up to the curb outside Departures, he realizes you’re actually leaving. No waving from the kitchen window for a few days, no late night trips over through the back garden.

He takes your bags out the back and makes sure nothing has fallen out of your personal item, including the snacks he packed last night while you showered. Cups your face with those big hands as he confirms that you have everything.

Despite the chaos that is the drop-off area of San Diego International, he wraps his arms around you with a tight squeeze, committing every curve of your body to memory. Kisses to the top of your head as you remind him you’ll be back before the weekend.

“Have I told you that I’m going to miss you?”

“A few times, but I like the reminders.”

The kiss he gives you makes you yearn to already be back to him, sweet and firm and full of love. The soft press of his lips as he reminds himself you’re in public, but also needs to make sure you come back to him and happy to give you incentive.

You’d probably have missed your flight if he had his way, but the traffic controller starts whistling for him to move on and keep the drop-off area clear. Robert reluctantly releases you, squeezing your hip as you grab all your bags.

“Bye, I love you!”

Your eager wave is the last thing he sees before you’re swallowed by the crowd.

[curio-queries]

I just read your I Am Still review and it makes me curious what namjoon's movie (not sure if its meant to be a docu?) will look like.

I know BH could do better in a lot of ways, but I do think a lot of the stuff tied to bts' solo promotions is really a reflection of where they are at artistically as individuals. Like I'm sure BH lays out a profit plan (i.e. we want an album, a video release, merch, etc.), but other than that, I do think a lot of it is up to them what direction they take. Like if they have something specific in mind or want to go waaaay more artistic, namjoon's solo seems to show that BH will put in the money and allow them to do that. On the other hand, I do think, if they don't have a direction in mind, BH just gives them the memories, in-house BH editor treatment (which could be better and they could at least get an actual docu director if they plan for a theatrical release, I know people felt this way even for Beyond the Star).

I actually love a lot of the songs on Golden (I'm a pop-whore through and through), but I do think jungkook hasn't quite found himself yet, or his unique artistic vision. And I think that flows into the content related to the album. I don't know if its controversial to say as a fan, but I think even calling the album "Golden" and then comments I've seen about the docu, it feels more like him trying to live up to his "Golden Maknae" status of mega pop stardom than necessarily finding himself in this album. And to be clear, those things don't have to be mutually exclusive! But I do think jungkook doesn't necessarily dig deep or get vulnerable in this album, so it doesn't surprise me that the docu might also feel that way. I also feel like this is why JPD might feel a little more cohesive, because I do think jimin is farther along in his artistic journey (being vulnerable, knowing what he wants to say as an artist even if its not fully polished yet, etc.). And this no shade to jungkook, I think all of the vocal line haven't had the opportunity to grow outside the group like the rap line has, especially the younger members whose entire artistic career/view has been shaped within a group setting. Finding yourself takes time, and trial and error. Sometimes I feel like jimin doesn't get enough credit for the fact that his first entirely solo project was so personal and he was so involved in the entire creative conception of it, especially for someone as reserved as him.

I am excited to see what Jin will end up coming out with (I love the The Astronaut song) and it'll be interesting to see the direction each member takes post military service. Even styling-wise, I'm curious what each member will do. I've hated jimin's styling for all of his solo projects (except the sparkly denim LC outfit) and most of jungkook's outside of SNTY. Please let the weird, ugly mullet, lego hair-piece looking stuff die and also extremely baggy clothes. I need fashion to have evolved by the time they get discharged because jimin should not need to be pulling up his pant's leg while he dances.

Hi anon,

Thank you for sending this in. I apologize that it's been ages, I got quite sick for a bit there and didn't have the energy to deal with tumblr. (Sidenote, the feed is kind of a disaster right now. I hope people can return to celebrating content again soon, I'm ready to stop unfollowing people every time I log in.)

Anyway, I'm so glad you brought up Namjoon's film because I'm so INTRIGUED. What are the criteria for this film festival? Is there any hope that it's been handled properly? What do we know about the director? Is this just another Hybe edit and they've strong-armed is into the festival? Is there going to be any way for us to watch it?

I don't really have any answers to these questions yet but it's kind of my only hope left of a decent film that's not just bangtantv content.

I actually really loved the idea of Golden being the album title and many of the choices surrounding it's release. Such great imagery and art surrounding his tattoos and just completely celebrating everything that led to JK as a person. But...it has very little connection to the actual music. Again, other than this idea that JK was actively pursuing himself as an extremely technically-exceptional singer, what does Golden have to do with the music? Other than one (possible coincidental) reference in STNY, this album could have been called anything. It's not the worst offense of an album but the rest of BTS's work has raised my expectations in having all sides of a release being exceptional. And this just wasn't for me. Not bad. But not astounding.

Also, can I say I'm so relieved to hear someone else voicing my same opinions on the styling for JM that last year. I absolutely despised the mullets and the baggy puts that he had to lift during choreo. Seriously anon, how did you get inside my brain?? I didn't mention this anywhere because everyone was gushing about it but it just pulled me out of it. Every.Single.Time. Can we be besties? Lol

Anyway, I'm sure I missed something in your ask. Still not feeling 100% but I don't want to delay this response any longer. Thank you so much for your patience!